A Shelter for Broken Hearts
by absolutefluffiness
Summary: Sometimes the brokenhearted take comfort in each other—and love has a way of blossoming from friendship.
1. Rough Beginnings

**A Shelter for Broken Hearts: Slowly, Sweetly Redux**

Summary: Sometimes the brokenhearted take comfort in each other—and love has a way of blossoming from friendship.

Disclaimer: I don't own the CCS characters but this plot is mine.

Kindly see the notes after the end. Thanks!

* * *

**Chapter 1: Rough Beginnings**

Good friends always remember how they met, and if you asked Syaoran Li how he'd met Sakura Kinomoto, he would feign ignorance, glare, and end the conversation. If pressed, he would claim he'd forgotten how he'd met her.

But in truth he _did_ remember how they'd met two years ago, through their respective best friends. Sakura's best friend Tomoyo, a fashion designer, had gotten her an exclusive interview with Japan's hottest balladeer, Eriol Hiiragizawa, who was her client. Sakura had wound up working for an entertainment magazine after college, to her own surprise, and she liked doing interviews for them.

Eriol had thoroughly enjoyed Sakura's off-the-beaten-path questions like, "Do you believe that music creates reality?" He was flattered to learn that she had done a crash course on him to know what he did and the statements he made most often, thus preventing her from asking questions he was tired of answering.

It was when she asked, "There's this study that shows that music—along with scent—triggers and makes memory. Do you choose your songs on that basis? You're known for songs that touch the heart...and you seem to wear your heart on your sleeve. Yet is it you? You seem so...different...in person. More calm, more composed, more…more like someone who's shy and sensitive. No offense meant, Hiiragizawa-san."

"None taken, Sakura-san, and do call me Eriol. Allow me to explain. The discrepancy is because someone helps me write my songs," Eriol admitted with a smile.

"But you take them and make them your own," Sakura said admiringly.

"Still...I believe that he deserves credit for his achievements. Allow me to introduce him to you." Eriol bowed and moved to the music room of his studio.

"Him" was his long-time collaborator and best friend, composer Syaoran Li. Eriol thought Sakura could get a good story out of the interview, and dragged a reluctant Syaoran into the room.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Syaoran, in the process of demolishing a complimentary tray of sushi Eriol had received, hissed when Eriol yanked him away from the food.

"There's someone I'd like you to meet," Eriol said. "The girl interviewing me."

"Why do I have to talk to some bimbo?" Syaoran didn't bother lowering his voice; he hoped the girl in the next room would hear, be offended, and leave.

"She's not a bimbo, Syaoran," Eriol smiled. "And I think you'll get along." Using his taller, more muscular body, Eriol managed to fling Syaoran into the next room and onto a couch across Sakura.

"This is my best friend and collaborator Syaoran Li. Syaoran, this is Sakura Kinomoto," Eriol began.

Syaoran nodded slightly in her direction and raised an eyebrow rudely at Sakura, who smiled at him.

"Hi! So you write Eriol Hiiragizawa's songs?" The question was not unexpected, and Syaoran sighed in frustration at the perky girl before him. She smiled; he rolled his eyes.

_How do I discourage this Barbie girl? _Syaoran wondered. He decided to start by rudely looking her over. She was pretty; _girls like her always are_, he mused. Big green eyes, a ready smile, cheeks flushed with good health, a good figure. _Boring_, he thought. She smiled at him in a friendly way, and his defenses automatically went up. Syaoran told himself didn't much care for her; he was tired of pretty girls flinging themselves at him since he'd suffered that particular burden since middle school. Perky, pretty girls like Sakura simply annoyed him; he found them shallow and uninteresting.

"Yeah." Syaoran did not expound. Instead he crossed his arms and looked at her coldly. His hostile demeanor often ended conversations quickly, and he'd learned to wield it to keep people away from him.

Since high school, he'd been annoyed by women who tried to go after him; he always suspected they were after the money of the Lis, no matter how many times his best friend Eriol pointed out that perhaps his devastating good looks had something to do with it.

It didn't help that Syaoran was nursing a broken heart from a painful divorce, and he was still angry about the loss, hurt beyond belief. And so he poured his hostility into his glare, crossing his arms and sinking into the couch.

Sakura was unfazed though; years of dealing with her older brother Touya had taught her to see through demeanors like Syaoran's, and she could see a shy, hurt young man behind it. A rather handsome shy young man, she thought, and she suppressed the urge to giggle. His tousled chocolate-brown hair and amber eyes were striking, and he had an arrogant air to him that made him even more attractive.

"I was telling Eriol-kun how I admired his songs and he said I ought to talk to you. I mentioned some songs, and he said they were your compositions completely. I think those songs touch the heart...you know heartbreak so well."

His face didn't change, although one corner of his mouth lifted slightly. Syaoran was sick of being psychoanalyzed. _Fuck off,_ he thought at Sakura rudely.

Yet she plunged on. "You wear your heart on a sleeve in these compositions. Eriol-san says he rarely changes anything from your original demo CDs. Is it easier for you to express your pain through music? I mean, heartbreak is a constant...everyone goes through it...but with you, it's a deep, painful longing...like you're searching for your heart again. And I think it's been a least a year or so since your heart was broken because it feels like you've had time to brood over the pain. Was it...if I may be so bold...was it a divorce you didn't want?"

Syaoran's dark brown eyes widened as he stared at Sakura. Her green eyes were sympathetic, not mocking. She was sincere. How had she known? How had she reached into his emotions and known about his ex-wife Loraina, whose private name with him was Alia? The beautiful violet-eyed blonde had swept into his life, given him a taste of love...then left, divorcing him after a year.

Yet Sakura had somehow seen the story through his songs. He would later learn that Sakura had become more empathic, more insightful over the years—plenty of heartbreak and the influence of Tomoyo made it inevitable.

Correctly interpreting his silence, she said, "I understand lonely people," she said gently. "Because...I'm that way too. I just wish I could express my heart as well as you, in a way that helps people like me let out what's in our hearts. So when I see that in others, it's a talent I admire."

She smiled, though Syaoran noticed the smile didn't reach her eyes—something he would notice a lot in her, and which everyone else save for Tomoyo overlooked.

"Anyway, what I meant to say is that I understand you because of your songs. You express the feelings so well, and I sort of 'read' your story through them. Especially that part in 'Let the Pain Remain', the one that goes _'So let the pain remain forever in my heart, for every throb it brings is one more moment spent with you. I'll let the pain bring on the rain if that's the only way, if there's no other way to be with you again.'_ **(1)** You know," and Sakura smiled but looked away, "it was like you were saying what I felt. I cried when I first heard that song. Because it's so true. Even painful memories are better compared to nothing sometimes."

Syaoran's body language had changed completely, Sakura noticed. He held himself more loosely now; his eyes were wider, and his aura of hostility was gone. So she went on with another comment. Neither of them noticed that Tomoyo had joined Eriol and was watching them in the doorway.

"I remember the first time I heard 'Mary Says.' I…" and Sakura's voice hitched, "I can never forget the part that goes, _'Goodbye yesterday, I see my dreams walking away. And Mary looks just like she did before, 'cept she don't love me anymore. So what happens next? Do I listen to my mind or heart? I don't know where to start feeling all right again.'_ **(2)** I wonder if I can presume to say this to you but… I believe things become all right if you set yourself to it. It's not something you have to believe in but if someone else believes it for you then maybe…maybe you will be." And she smiled the kind of smile Syaoran saw so rarely these days: kind, sweet, and understanding.

Syaoran took a long time to speak, merely staring at Sakura. She patiently waited for him, neither smiling nor frowning—just being there.

_Who was this woman? _Syaoran frowned, and looked away, ashamed at having been seen through so easily by a woman he thought was just a smiling idiot. He knew he should drive her away; everything in his experience was screaming at him to push her away.

But sometimes the heart teaches the head lessons it needs to learn. Syaoran would never regret the next words he said.

"What did you say your name was again?"

* * *

"You ran into Sakura-san at the grocery?" Eriol's eyebrows quirked in amusement.

"Yeah," Syaoran threw himself on the couch of Eriol's studio. "Damnedest thing. I was out to get some butter and there she was looking at the milk. Seems she had an interview in the area and decided to go there on an impulse."

Eriol waited; Syaoran wouldn't have mentioned it if there was nothing else to it.

"Well, er…I slipped. I was trying to sneak past her—didn't want to say hello, really, and she had her back to me anyway but I didn't see the water on the floor leaking from the refrigerator case. I knocked Kinomoto down and got her wet. Her shirt was white, so I had to buy her a new one."

Shoulders quaking, Eriol laughed. "Good Lord, Syaoran, you aren't normally like that."

"I know!" Syaoran threw his hands up. "And there's more!"

"Really now," Eriol grinned.

"Yesterday I was at the gym, and on the way out—you know I prefer to shower at home—on the way out my cell phone rang. I was digging through my pockets when it slipped out of my hand."

"See what happens when your hands are sweaty?" Eriol chortled.

"Oh shut it. Anyway she turned the corner and it hit her. On the head. Thing is, she managed to catch it before she went down."

Eriol blinked. "Syaoran, normally when a man likes a woman he asks her out. He doesn't assault her twice in a row."

"Oh come on," Syaoran rounded on Eriol, who was giggling like a girl. "It's not like I did it on purpose! And I don't like her that way. _**Puh-lease**_."

_Ah but you like her enough to mention her,_ Eriol smiled. "Bet she thinks you're stalking her," he teased.

"Am not!" Syaoran said indignantly. "It just happened…"

"Kaho used to say that there is no such thing as coincidence, only hitsuzen. Kind of like destiny."

"Eriol, if you're implying what I think you are, get ready to eat my shorts," Syaoran threatened.

Eriol held up his hands. "Okay, I shall desist. But, the least you can do is apologize to Sakura-san."

"I did," Syaoran sighed.

"Without the word 'sorry' entering the conversation at any point," Eriol chuckled.

Syaoran glared. "I told her I'd blow her to a good meal and she forgave me. Just like that," and he snapped his fingers.

"When?" Eriol forebore to point out that this would be Syaoran's first time out with a woman in over a year.

"Tomorrow. I'm taking her to dinner and praying I can stuff her with good food and she won't sue me."

"Good luck then. Make sure it's a good place. Are you not going to ask me to recommend a place?" Eriol's eyes twinkled.

"No thanks," Syaoran rolled his eyes. "Knowing you, any place you recommend will charge ten thousand yen for a glass of water."

"O ye of little faith," Eriol began.

"So…here's the melody I worked out for that drivel you wrote the other day," Syaoran talked loudly over Eriol as he opened the grand piano. "Now listen!" He began to play, though he was pressing the keys with unusual vehemence.

Eriol smiled to himself. Tomoyo indeed had the best instincts when it came to matching people up. He quickly typed out a text message on his phone and sent it to her. This would be very interesting to discuss, indeed.

He would end up discussing it with two people, in the end, one of whom would find the situation very, very interesting indeed.

0-0-0

"Er, Li-kun? Where are we going?" Sakura asked hesitantly.

"A Korean restaurant. It's got a Michelin star. It's here in Ikebukuro," Syaoran said. "Just a minute away."

Sakura didn't protest. She vaguely knew of a Korean restaurant with a Michelin star—but it was in Ginza. Given the determined and somewhat irritated look on Syaoran's face, though, she decided not to say anything.

Soon she realized they'd been walking for ten minutes.

"Ne, Li-kun, just how long is your concept of a minute?" Sakura teased.

"I said we'll be there soon!" Syaoran said, almost blushing from embarrassment.

"I do believe you're lost," Sakura said after a few more blocks of aimless walking.

"I am not!" Syaoran retorted. "I'm just…disorientated."

"Is there even such a word?"

Syaoran turned and rolled his eyes when he noticed she was grinning. "Hey, this is my apology so shut up."

"Ooh, so gentlemanly," Sakura teased.

Syaoran groaned and refused to answer; by this time he was ready to enter just about any restaurant that looked even vaguely Korean. Sakura was still making jokes about his need for a GPS, but she was also slowing down and getting quieter—and Syaoran realized it meant she was getting tired. And it was his fault.

He felt guilty; here he was, intending to apologize for the past two incidents, and he was being rude to her. Worse, this probably would count as a third incident…he could just imagine her telling Daidouji about this: _He dragged me around Ikebukuro and he starved me and he got us lost!_ Syaoran shuddered. His pride would never let him admit he was lost, though, and when he saw the quaint little café with the bright colors he associated with Korea, he grabbed Sakura's hand and pulled her in, heartily exclaiming, "Here we are!"

Disbelieving, she stared at the sign. "This doesn't look Korean to me…" she began. "For one thing, the sign is in English."

Loftily he said, "It is. The owner is Korean, and Koreans love cute stuff. And they're good with English." He prayed she knew nothing about Korea.

She stared at him, unable to believe his cheek or his pride, whichever was worse. He knew she knew he was bluffing, but he refused to cave in. Luckily she didn't take him to task for it; instead she giggled and pointed towards a tall, slender blond man with an apron reading "Kiss the Owner, Please!" who was welcoming guests.

"And I assume Koreans have genetic predispositions towards blond hair and blue eyes?"

"Of course," Syaoran baldly lied. "The war, you know."

Sakura snorted but said nothing, much to Syaoran's relief.

When the owner introduced himself later as "Fay D. Flourite" as he took their orders, Sakura let loose a tiny giggle and kicked Syaoran under the table.

It didn't hurt, but Syaoran gasped indignantly. The last time anyone had treated him that way, with such familiarity…was so long ago. His cousin Meiling loved annoying him; though she was much, much more abrasive than Sakura, the gesture still warmed him a little. She took things easily—in perfect counterpoint to his hidden tendency to get overemotional at times.

"Last time I checked, 'Fay D. Flourite' wasn't a Korean name," she ragged him, chortling with laughter. "Come on. Admit you were wrong."

Refusing to compromise his dignity, Syaoran pretended he was going to the bathroom but turned and dodged into the kitchen, to the bemusement of the staff. Upon passing the tall blond and blue-eyed owner, he turned to the cheerful-looking man.

"May I please speak with you, sir?" he asked urgently.

"Certainly, if you call me Fay," the owner said with a wide smile.

"Er, yes. Fay-san." Syaoran cleared his throat nervously. "I have a favor to ask. Please, pretend you're Korean, sir. Or that you know the language. Or something."

The older man's eyes sparkled with mischief. "Why certainly. The customer gets what the customer wants. But may I ask why?"

Left with no other option, Syaoran confessed, and Fay had the grace not to laugh. Instead, he returned the money to and smiled. "Your girlfriend is very lovely, and for you to go such lengths to try and please her is a lovely gesture."

Syaoran flushed. "She's **not** my girlfriend!"

The owner looked into Syaoran's eyes, and seemed to find something there. He smiled again. "My mistake. My apologies, sir."

Syaoran returned

When he served their vegetable and seafood soup, he suddenly greeted them with "_A__nnyeonghaseyo! Jal meokkesseumnida_."

Sakura's jaw dropped. "Was that…Korean?"

The owner laughed and bowed. "Why yes. I said 'hello' and 'bon appetit'. You could say I serve fusion Korean here. Try the beef stew."

"But…you're not Korean?"

"No, but I studied there for a while," and Flourite winked at Syaoran as he left to get their pasta.

As soon as he left, Sakura turned to Syaoran. "Hoe! So this is technically a Korean place?"

"Told you so," Syaoran smirked.

"Oh…Um, I'm sorry I doubted you."

He nodded smugly.

When the beef stew arrived, Sakura tasted it; a big smile spread across her face. "Oh, this is just wonderful."

The other dishes arrived, and Sakura ate her fill of the wonderful chicken and orange salad, pasta with fatty tuna in a delectable cream sauce, a pork and potato casserole, and a melt-in-your-mouth meringue.

"Wow. Just wow. Thank you, Li-kun. This was amazing!" Sakura said.

"As to be expected. I have good taste, even when others doubt me," Syaoran kept a straight face as he said this.

She looked so remorseful that Syaoran broke down and confessed his deception, feeling uneasy. Sakura hit his arm, and in retaliation, he pretended to smear froth from his coffee on her nose. When she squeaked and backed away from him, he finally let loose with hearty laughter.

She stared at him.

"You can laugh!"

"Of course I can," he said, returning to his usual gruff state.

"But you don't, normally," she said, sounding awed. "And you look good when you laugh."

"Oh shut up." But inwardly, he smiled at the compliment. He pulled a cigarette out of his breast pocket, intending to light up; it was a habit he'd picked up in the long lonely nights without his ex-wife.

"Er," Sakura frowned.

"Oh, I forgot to ask permission," Syaoran said. "I take it that's a no?"

"Please," Sakura requested, "don't. It's bad for you."

"I already have a mother," Syaoran complained as he shoved the cigarette back into his breast pocket.

"Still…" Sakura tried to look forbidding but wound up looking like a cute child trying to be stern.

Amused, Syaoran decided not to call her on it. "Fine. The nasty cigarette is gone."

"Permanently, I hope," Sakura said.

"What, you gonna stop me?"

Chin set firmly, Sakura nodded.

Syaoran chuckled, shaking his head. Then he asked for the bill. Sakura tried to pay 'her share' but Syaoran defeated her by shoving his card at the waitress who brought the bill.

"I said it was my treat, since I, uh, hurt you the last two times we met," he insisted.

"But next time is mine. Promise?" Sakura held out her pinky finger.

_Next time? So I'm not such bad company after all_, Syaoran the first time in what felt like forever, he smiled. "Only kids do that."

"It's much better when you smile," Sakura smiled at him.

Embarrassed, Syaoran wiped the smile off his face and grunted.

"So should I call you Grandpa?" Sakura impishly asked.

Snorting, he linked pinkies with her, and they shook on it.

The owner Fay bowed them out, and as Syaoran passed him, he whispered, "You ought not to let such a beautiful woman go." He pressed a business card into Syaoran's hand, and added, "Come back soon. I love watching love stories develop."

Pretending not to hear him, Syaoran bundled Sakura into a taxi and took her home to Tomoeda; he hadn't brought his car because he'd thought the place was nearby. She was about to ask him in for coffee when she realized her brother was home.

"Erm, raincheck?" she suggested. "My brother's kinda rude to my male visitors."

"Sure," Syaoran shrugged. "See you around. I'll call you about next week."

"My turn to pay!" Sakura reminded him, and he mock-sighed in exasperation.

"Fine, whatever, see you."

"And no cigarettes!" Sakura called.

"You wish," Syaoran muttered, rolling his eyes. But they kept the date, and soon began spending more time together.

And just like that, to Eriol and Tomoyo's surprise, Sakura and Syaoran became good friends.

* * *

It soon became a weekly habit for Syaoran and Sakura to eat at the Cat's Eye Café, then on weekends, they would hang out at the other's place, sometimes doing chores for each other, sometimes just hanging out.

But the beginning of their friendship was quite rough, no thanks to his distrusting nature and her tendency to retreat when hurt beyond her tolerance. Sometimes he would lash out, and Sakura would not contact him for some time. Syaoran did not know then why he kept seeking her out, offering wordless apologies by gruffly buying her small gifts or treats, and making an effort to be nicer around Sakura. Little by little he was changing, and Sakura gently praised him on that.

Later, Syaoran would understood that, like a stray cat that can sense where kindness and good food can be found, he had been attracted to Sakura's warmth and sweetness.

Some time into their friendship, Sakura was late arriving at the Cat's Eye café. Syaoran, annoyed, rang her phone several times, but there was no answer. He'd gotten up to leave when he saw her drifting towards him, looking dazed.

"Where the hell have you been? Do you realize how long I've been waiting?" Syaoran seethed.

She looked nervously over her shoulder. "Sorry, Syaoran-kun." She peered into the café and said, "Let's stay inside."

Syaoran groaned. He would definitely not be able to smoke indoors. But when he saw that she was shaking, he mistook it for fear.

"What are you afraid of?" he asked as they sat down.

That was when he noticed she was clenching her fists, and biting down hard on her lip. It was anger.

"Nothing," she tried to lie.

"Bullshit. This," and he drew out a cigarette, lighting it up brazenly where it was forbidden, "is nothing." He stabbed out the cigarette suddenly, making Sakura almost jump. "You are angry. Tell me why. After all I'm the one who had to sit here like a dateless turd for thirty minutes!"

Despite herself, Sakura smiled. "Dateless turd. Thanks for insulting yourself in advance," she grinned.

Syaoran's hand shot out and he grabbed hers. "You're shaking. Stop changing the topic, for fuck's sake."

The vulgarity surprised Sakura. She took several deep breaths, then looked at his hand. "You can let go now. I'll tell you."

He slowly let go of her hand, and the story unfolded. She'd almost run into her college boyfriend.

"So, what about him?" Syaoran asked impatiently.

"it's a long story," Sakura hesitated.

He raised an eyebrow and waited. After some more hesitation, Sakura slowly told him the story.

_College was a relief to Sakura after a bad high school experience, and she joyfully enrolled in the preschool teaching course that she wanted in the number one university in Japan. With Tomoyo as her roommate, she rented an apartment near Tokyo University._

_It was like being free. People had no preconceived notions of who she was there, and best of all, no one knew what had happened to her in high school. Sakura happily signed up for organizations, extracurricular activities, and got herself into a whirlwind of social activity which Tomoyo encouraged._

_It was through one of the clubs she joined that she met Emile. He was just a few inches taller, slightly chubby, but very cute. His shy smile attracted her, and when he asked her out, Sakura was thrilled. He was romantic and kind, and he paid attention to her—very unlike her terrible high school boyfriend Kito, whom Sakura tried not to think about._

_Tomoyo encouraged the budding friendship, and six months later, Emile quietly proposed to Sakura that they go steady. And Sakura, determined not to repeat her mistakes in high school, tried to get to know Emile as well as she could, spending time with him, making him good meals, being sweet._

_He found it funny. "And why do you want to know my favorite flower?" he asked as they snuggled on a large couple's swing._

"_I just want to know all I can about you," Sakura kissed the tip of his nose, then wiggled her toes in happiness._

"_Mmm. Orchids," Emile said, his dark brown eyes alight with humor. "Your favorite? You can't be the only one asking these questions."_

"_Nadeshiko blossoms! Favorite color?"_

_Emile laughed, running a hand through his short black hair. "I feel silly. Blue? Yours, I know, is pink."_

"_Okay," Sakura nodded, then giggled as Emile kissed her._

"_Do you have a list or something?" Emile asked curiously._

"_No. But I take everything you say down in my mind."_

"_That's sweet," Emile grinned, and kissed her hand. "That's why I love you."_

_Sakura beamed at him, and thanked the gods for bringing him into her life._

_He liked to surprise her; once, he'd pounced on her after class, covering her eyes and asking, "Guess who?"_

"_Emile!" Sakura flung her arms around his neck. The gentle-looking boy kissed her back, his dark eyes alight with laughter._

_Sakura had made a happy return to love thanks to Emile. He was kind and sweet, and he didn't pressure her to get into bed with him at the first opportunity. He was taking engineering, and intended to become a city councilor._

_It was a cozy, sweet relationship, as far as everyone knew—even Sakura. They moved from kissing to gentle making-out, and Sakura was grateful he never pushed her for more. Their relationship seemed like a textbook romance, and something nagged at her as a result._

"_I don't get it," Sakura said as she lolled in Tomoyo's room in their apartment. "We're happy. Why am I worried?"_

_Tomoyo was distracted, but working hard to cover it up; she had sneaked out for a tryst with Touya (who had himself run out on Yukito) that afternoon, and she didn't want Sakura to know. "Hmm...Maybe it's because you're not used to quiet relationships, Sakura-chan? No offense meant."_

_Sakura paused, chewing on a chocolate Pocky stick as she thought. "Well, yeah, maybe," she mused. "Oh, I'm being silly!"_

_Tomoyo would blame herself when the relationship blew up; she had been sneaking out of the apartment to meet with Touya, whom she loved. They would make passionate love, him skipping work, her cutting class. It was as though they knew their time together would not last...and given that he was cheating on someone else, it was doomed._

_Preoccupied this, Tomoyo had not noticed the warning signs: Emile making excuses to Sakura for not seeing her, Emile breaking dates at the last second, Emile being busy with study groups._

_And so when Sakura received the video in her email, it had shattered her._

_Tomoyo knew Emile was popular because of his leadership at a prestigious school fraternity, and he was sought after by the girls of the corresponding sorority. Sakura had turned down the sorority's invitation for her to join them, and unknowingly had set herself up for retribution from the rich, snobbish girls._

"_Hey, I have a video in my email," Sakura called to Tomoyo, who had just arrived, freshly bathed to hide the evidence of an afternoon her forbidden lover had spent making love to her. "How do I open the file?"_

_Tomoyo froze, terrified that Sakura would know what she had been up to that afternoon. She soon realized that Sakura was too engrossed in preparing her Christmas present to Emile. So she came over, and saw that the subject line was 'Surprise from Emile!' "Surprise from Emile? But the email address isn't his," she said, feeling a bit wary of the video._

"_Will DivX run this?" Sakura asked curiously._

"_Try it," Tomoyo said._

_Sakura clicked on 'download' and when the player ran, she was horrified to see a drunken Emile at a fraternity party pawing the leader of the sorority. He even pulled down the girl's shirt and bra to expose her breasts, and laughed raucously._

"_Aw, won't your sweet and cute girlfriend mind?" the sorority leader, whose name was Akane, asked as she ground her hips on his lap._

"_That virgin?" Emile snorted; it was an ugly side of him neither Sakura nor Tomoyo had even suspected was there. "Nah. She expects white lace and wedding bells. I wanna get laid tonight. I wanna fuuuccckkk." He made a lewd gesture with his hips and everyone roared with laughter._

"_Wanna do me?" Akane asked, leering at the camera. "I promise I won't be sweet and virginal." She raised her skirt and showed him her underwear—a tiny thong that left little to the imagination._

_For an answer, Emile groped her. Akane laughed and ground her hips into his hand. The camera followed as they vanished through a doorway in the fraternity house. _

_Then an off-camera girl's voice sneered, "Hey Kinomoto! This is what happens when you don't put out, and when you think you're too good for the rest of us!" High-pitched laughter from several women followed, and then the camera entered the bedroom._

_Tomoyo turned away; Sakura watched in horror as it showed Emile having sex with Akane. Every now and then he would make a crude comment, like "Your boobs are bigger than hers! Lemme have a handful!" And she knew he meant her._

_The video ended after a while, but Sakura had been unable to tear her eyes away from it._

"_Oh my God...I am so sorry..." was all Tomoyo could say. Sakura had numbly walked away, and was beginning to pack things in a bag._

"_Sakura?"_

"_I have...to return his presents," was the soft, frozen reply. "Only," Sakura spoke through her tears, which Tomoyo could see Sakura did not even feel, "I can't do it myself. Could you...please...give them back for me?" She tossed in the stuffed toys, the dried flowers, the love notes mechanically. Then she began, suddenly, to laugh. "He's wrong about one thing. I'm not a virgin," Sakura said._

_No. No, no, no...Tomoyo's hands flew to Sakura's mouth. "Don't, Sakura! Don't hurt yourself by bringing that up."_

"_Maybe I should've slept with him after all," Sakura continued to laugh hollowly. "Seems that's what he wanted." Then she began to sob in earnest. She had trusted Emile, thought he was the one to heal her wounds from Kito...yet he'd wound up inflicting more on her._

"_Oh Sakura," Tomoyo said as she held her best friend in her arms. She stroked Sakura's short auburn hair gently as Sakura cried, just as stunned. The video had clearly been taken on purpose, and Emile, drunk as he was, clearly did not love Sakura if he could sneer about her in that way._

Syaoran was silent. Then, "What a complete and utter loser of an asshole, and I insult assholes when I say that."

"Well, I sort of agree," Sakura tried to smile. "So…do you forgive me for being late?"

"Are you kidding?" Syaoran huffed. "Gimme his address so I can kick his nuts in for you."

Sakura almost smiled. "Someone already did."

"Really? Who? Tell me, so I can congratulate him," Syaoran asked eagerly.

"Her, actually."

"Who?"

This time, Sakura smiled. "My best friend. Tomoyo-chan."

"Daidouji?" Syaoran asked incredulously. "No way. Tell me that part."

"Well," and Sakura looked thoughtful, "when it happened, Tomoyo-chan saw that I kind of took it badly. And she didn't like that, so…I dunno exactly what happened, but he was expelled from school—and he didn't have a career. Last I heard he left the country—although I guess he's back now."

Leaning back, Syaoran whistled. "Remind me to ask her about it."

And he did. Tomoyo smiled, and serenely told him the story, with a few details corroborated by Eriol, to Syaoran's surprise.

Why did this have to happen? _Tomoyo raged. She knew Sakura was heartsore because she'd constantly been rejected—through no fault of her own. Yukito Tsukishiro, her brother's boyfriend, had been her crush; she'd taken the news of his relationship with Touya cheerfully. She'd liked a boy in middle school, and told him of her feelings; luckily Haru was a kind boy, and told her that he liked her but not that way—because he wanted to court Tomoyo. Tomoyo had turned him down in order not to break Sakura's heart even more._

_When Tomoyo returned Emile's gifts to Sakura the next day, he at least had the grace to look ashamed. "Tomoyo-san..."_

"_It's Daidouji to you," Tomoyo cut him off coldly, dropping the bags at his feet so she wouldn't have to touch him._

"_...er..." Emile scratched his head. "Can you help me? I know I, uh, pulled a boo-boo there," and he laughed, "but...You see, I still like Sakura and I think she'd make a good trophy wife for my political career, so maybe I could...can you help me win her back?" He smiled at her in what he thought was a winning manner._

_Tomoyo drew herself to her full height. "No." She wanted to add, _'you stupid whorish scumbag, you disgusting cretin,'_ but she did not want to give him the satisfaction of knowing he'd gotten to her too. She made a hand signal, and her bodyguards stepped forward._

"_Try to approach me or Sakura-chan again, and..." Tomoyo began to laugh her oh-ho-ho-ho laugh, but in a cold manner, "maybe you'd like someone else in my family to deal with you?"_

_Emile went pale; the rumor on campus was that Tomoyo's father was the ruthless Yakuza leader Kirigo Daidouji, who had been known to slowly cut pieces off his enemies while keeping them alive._

"_No...S...Sorry!" He'd fled, leaving the gifts behind._

_Tomoyo snorted, and left the presents in a nearby donation box for a local shelter. _Coward_. She wasn't related to the Yakuza leader and she'd never said anything, but people believed what they wanted to...and who was she not to use the advantage? Her father was dead, but no one had ever asked her about it. She'd meant her mother—if Sonomi Daidouji ever found out what Emile had done to Sakura, he would find himself missing vital parts of his anatomy while still being alive._

_She'd dealt with Akane the same way, and since Akane was on a scholarship funded by the Amamiya Industries, which were owned by Sonomi Daidouji, it was a simple thing to let the girl know who owned Amamiya Industries. Tomoyo had demanded that the entire sorority leave Sakura alone, or Akane would find herself serving burgers or doing porn for a living. Terrified, Akane acceded; there was no way she could pay for her college tuition on her own._

_She waited for the chance to ruin Emile for good, using her trusty camera as a weapon. A week before elections for the student president of their university, where he was a front-runner, she posted videos of him having sex with other girls in the sorority, planning to spend student council money, and mocking his admirers as 'lapdogs'--all on the college website, with the help of a hacker friend who hated Emile. It had been taken down, but the damage was done: Emile lost his credibility, lost the elections, and was nearly expelled for drinking on campus. He had no idea who had done it to him, and Tomoyo preferred it that way._

_But the satisfaction of taking vengeance for Sakura soon became something hollow when she noticed that from then on, Sakura always had the ghost of tears in her eyes no matter how widely she smiled._

"She does that," Syaoran said thoughtfully. "When she thinks you're not looking, her eyes tell the truth; she still nurses some other demons in her heart."

He missed the glance Eriol and Tomoyo gave each other. "Of course. But she will tell you herself, in due time, Li-kun," Tomoyo said gently.

"Remind me to be nicer to her," Syaoran said to Eriol.

"You can start by telling her your own story," Eriol said quietly.

"I can't…" Syaoran protested, but only by force of habit. Thinking on it later, though, he decided that he would.

He turned to Tomoyo. "What happened to Sakura…I couldn't handle that if it happened to me."

_Oh, but Sakura has handled much worse, _Tomoyo thought. That particular secret was Sakura's alone to reveal, though.

Little did they know that she was in for more misery in the months to come. Because at that moment, everything seemed quite fine.

**(To be continued next weekend)**

* * *

This is a reworking of my "Slowly, Sweetly" story to put events in chronological order and fix a few errors and vague parts. I hope this is less confusing.

The Eriol/Tomoyo story has mostly been taken out so I can focus on SxS. I hope you like it. Unfortunately "The Heart Has Seasons" is on hiatus because my co-author is currently busy with other projects and we've got an awful time trying to get in touch.

To readers of the original "Slowly, Sweetly": I promise that story will end…in fact the next three chapters have been written out but until I can revise them until they read well, this will be what I offer instead. This will be updated every week or so because it's a rewrite, but every chapter will contain new material. It's my little gift to you guys for being so kind. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. (SMILE) Do leave me a review to let me know how I'm doing?

**In Chapter 2, up next weekend: **_It's Syaoran's turn to talk about his past as he and Sakura get closer. Too bad this is when Yue walks into her life._

**Notes:**

Sakura is technically a reporter here. CCS suggests she might become a teacher or athlete, but she has the perkiness required of reporters for her beat.

Why is Syaoran the composer and not the performer? Syaoran does not like performing in the series but he seems to have an artistic bent of sorts, so why not let Eriol be frontman?

(1) Lyrics from "Let the Pain Remain" by Basil Valdez.

(2) Lyrics from "Mary Says" by Leehom Wang.

Hitsuzen is sort of like fate or the inevitable. This concept permeates Clamp works, and in CCS Kaho Mizuki and Touya Kinomoto say in the first episode of the Last Judgment (season 2), "There is no such thing as coincidence, only hitsuzen."

A Michelin star is a very rare and coveted gourmet accreditation for a restaurant.

Fay D. Flourite is a character from Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles. Someday I will write my own CCS-Tsubasa crossover (hehe). He will play a bigger role in this revision. In the TRC manga he ran a cafe, and his cheerfulness is a great foil for Syaoran's grumpiness. (In TRC's early stages the Syaoran there is cheerful and innocent, very unlike our dear CCS Syaoran, haha)

_Annyeonghaseyo! Jal meokkesseumnida_ - Korean for hello and bon appetit, as closely as I can approximate it; if I'm wrong and you're Korean, feel free to correct me!

Syaoran smoking- It's mentioned in the original, and I decided to keep it, to show how Sakura breaks him of the habit and how the process helps them become closer; he kicks the habit for her.

Syaoran calling Sakura "You"- In the series he doesn't call her name until the cute elevator episode. In the manga it comes right before the last Judgment. In both instances he was falling for her already, so I'll follow that here.

Syaoran is perfect, right? Let's knock him off his pedestal for a bit, taking his character to one possible extreme. Note how aggressive Syaoran is with Loraina, and how, sadly, he does not realize how his possessiveness with her backfires in the end. He has to learn a lot before he ends up with Sakura, the true love of his life.

Remember how Meiling gave Syaoran the loophole in the series when she said she would be his bride? I thought it would be interesting to use it on Syaoran.

Sakura and Syaoran's characters change slightly in this rewrite. I wanted to bring them closer to their CCS selves, plus the advice from **J****ulia and Tania, mystic emeralds, Diney Blue **and** Janec Shannon** recently has helped me so much in refiguring this story.


	2. Moving Along

**A Shelter for Broken Hearts **

**Summary:** _Sometimes the brokenhearted take comfort in each other—and love has a way of blossoming from friendship._

**Disclaimer:** _I don't own the CCS characters but this plot is mine._

**absolutefluffiness says: **_Whew, update is on time and it is LONG. Sorry about that, I'll try to make next week's update a bit shorter…unless you like long chapters? Do let me know, thank you! Notes and thanks at the end ^_^_

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* * *

  
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**Chapter 2: Moving Along**

"He's like another Touya," Sakura giggled over lunch with her best friend Tomoyo.

"Oh? And here I was worried that you were replacing me," Tomoyo teased.

"Please. Syaoran-kun does not have your fashion sense," Sakura laughed.

"Nobody does," Tomoyo said serenely, hiding a smile. She called him "Syaoran-kun" now, and it amused her. "But really now, Sakura-chan, you're both single. Why don't you…"

"Ack! Stop right there, Tomoyo-chan. You are not going to try and set me up again."

"But I haven't set you up yet," Tomoyo pointed out.

"Uh, okay. But you know what I mean. Besides, it would be like dating Touya," Sakura said.

"Heaven forfend. Have they met?"

"No, but they will, this weekend. I invited Syaoran over to have dinner with Dad and onii-chan this Sunday."

Tomoyo almost choked on her strawberry sherbet. "No…Goodness, I can almost imagine the fireworks now!"

"Syaoran is not dating me. He'll be fine," Sakura said confidently.

"So you say now," Tomoyo's eyes twinkled. She tapped out a message on her iPhone.

"You did not," Sakura's eyes widened, "just text Eriol-san, did you?"

"And if I did?"

"Even Syaoran-kun will tell you there's nothing going on! As for you and Eriol-san, I think…"

Tomoyo laughed. "He's my client. I…" She stopped. "Oh, nothing." She waved a hand cheerily in Sakura's direction, and said, "We are quite definitely not involved."

Sakura knew why. Tomoyo was seeing someone she did not want Sakura to know about. Though she could be dense and occasionally oblivious, Sakura thought she already knew who Tomoyo was seeing.

Her brother, Touya.

She loved both her best friend and cousin, and her brother, too much to let them know that she knew. Once, she had arrived home and seen the two kissing passionately; that was back in college. Sakura knew Touya lived with Yukito Tsukishiro, his lover, whom she had herself loved as a child. But this…her heart ached to see the tenderness, the love in how they held, touched, and kissed each other.

Because she longed to be loved that way. Sakura's past experiences with men had not been good, and since her last two boyfriends—Kito in high school and Emile in college—she had not had any luck in love. Friends like Chiharu Mihara-Yamazaki, Naoko Yanisagawa, and Rika Sasaki would occasionally set her up, but there would either be no spark, or she did not like the men involved.

But Tomoyo and Touya were passionate lovers; she could tell from how they carried themselves that they were madly in love. And Sakura wondered what it was like to be kissed that way, to be made love to that way, to just be that way with a man who loved her as much as she loved him.

That Tomoyo and Touya felt the need to hide their affair was something Sakura understood. While she did not want to take sides, she did not want to have to hurt anyone on purpose, and so she kept silent. Neither of them knew that she knew, and she kept the secret…just as she kept some other secrets in her life, secrets she could not discuss with Tomoyo or Syaoran.

So she looked at Tomoyo and smiled what Tomoyo called "Sakura's keeping-secrets smile."

"It's all right. I'm sure you'll find out exactly what Touya thinks of Syaoran," she said impishly.

"My spying secrets are my own," Tomoyo grinned. "Good luck this weekend, then. No, I think the person who needs that good-luck wish...is Li-kun."

* * *

That Sunday, Syaoran arrived at the Kinomoto household early, clutching a bouquet of flowers and dressed in a rather warm long-sleeved shirt and a tie. He looked handsome—but overdressed for the occasion.

Sakura goggled at them. "What are those for?"

"Erm," Syaoran almost blushed, "Aren't you supposed to bring this when you're invited to dinner?"

"Uh…Didn't you say you've been living in Japan for ten years or so now?" Sakura asked. "So you ought to know the etiquette."

"Y-yes, but," Syaoran fidgeted, "I…uh, thought this was appropriate."

"You're uncomfortable," Sakura pointed out. "Oh sheesh, Syaoran-kun, let me." He now allowed her to call him by name, though he often just called her "Hey" or "Hey you" instead of Sakura. It annoyed her, and he liked teasing her with it—though right now he stayed quiet. She rolled up his sleeves for him and yanked off his tie. "There. Better."

"Won't an informal outfit insult the family?"

"Syaoran Li, unless you came here to win my hand in marriage…" Sakura put her arms on her hips. "What is the problem? No," she held up a hand, "I think I got it. You didn't get out much in the past, huh?"

_Oh snap_, Syaoran thought. She was right. He said nothing.

"Ah-ha," Sakura grinned. "I knew it. Oh come on in. I want my friends to know my family—and I expect to meet your family someday as well. Or else!"

Syaoran grumbled something she didn't catch, then followed her into the kitchen. She shooed him out and dumped him in the living room with the remote for the TV.

"And stay out of my kitchen…you're the guest!" she said.

He sat there, aimlessly surfing, when he noticed a dark-haired older man watching him. Syaoran stood up, bowing stiffly and saying, "Good evening…"

"Well, you're handsome, but Sakura says you're Chinese," the man said rudely instead of acknowledging his greeting.

"What?" Syaoran felt he didn't like the man; his temper bristled at the very sight of him.

"I must say, her taste is improving," the stranger continued.

"Who are you?" Syaoran asked, rather rudely himself.

"Onii-chan!" Sakura scolded. "This is my friend, Syaoran Li. He's a composer. Syaoran, this is my mean older brother, Touya."

"Nice to meet you," Syaoran said, and added under his breath, "I think." He earned himself a slap on the arm from Sakura.

"Ow!" he protested.

"Be nice," she scolded. "You too, onii-chan."

"You're asking me to be nice to a rich brat?" He raised one dark brow.

"I am not a brat!" Syaoran retorted.

"Onii-chan!"

"Brat's a brat. Only rich brats can afford to bum around and be composers and stuff like that." Touya shrugged.

"He happens to be Eriol Hiiragizawa's writing partner," Sakura huffed.

Touya looked surprised. "That friend of Tomoyo's?"

Sakura almost smiled at the slipup; Touya had called Tomoyo by her first name. "Yes, the singer."

"Oh, all right then." Touya eyed Syaoran balefully. "I still don't like him."

Syaoran rolled his eyes.

"Now quit it!" Sakura was beginning to turn red from annoyance. "I just…"

"Sakura," Syaoran said quietly, "I smell something from the kitchen."

"Hoe!" Sakura dashed back into it, with a parting shot of "Now you two be nice!"

Touya resumed looking at Syaoran, who glared back.

"Impudent pup," Touya growled.

Syaoran bit his tongue to keep from saying what he really wanted.

"Oh, I get it. You're hanging on to your temper because she asked you to. Good boy. Maybe I'll let you date her."

"I am not…You…Hey!" Syaoran spluttered. "We are not that way!"

Touya raised a brow. "Are you gay?"

"No!" Syaoran almost yelled.

"Then why aren't you going after my sister? She's very pretty. Isn't she good enough for you?"

"What the hell?" Syaoran frowned. "Why does it always have to be about that kind of thing? Huh?"

"Men and women can't just be friends, I believe that," Touya said.

"Believe what you will," Syaoran said huffily, "but we're friends."

"You'll change your mind," Touya grinned, "and I'm going to laugh at you when you do."

"Whatever," Syaoran seethed.

Sakura called them to the dinner table then; Sakura and Touya's father Fujitaka was already there, and when Syaoran realized who he was, he turned into a fanboy; Sakura was vastly amused to discover he had bought all of Fujitaka's archaeology books. Their spirited discussions of expeditions and history made Touya roll his eyes and Sakura giggle. So involved were the two in their discussions that Sakura had to pointedly remind Syaoran to eat, and later, when the conversation continued in the den over tea, Touya had made a snide comment about "people who monopolize other people's fathers."

Undaunted, Syaoran asked for, and got, Fujitaka's email address, beginning a regular correspondence that amused Sakura no end. He and Sakura's father became friends, and in the discussions of archaeology and history, Syaoran found a way to forget the pain of his own past. He and Sakura drew even closer together, and soon, they were at the point of confessions and personal revelations.

One evening, at the home Syaoran and his ex-wife had shared, they were having drinks—tequila for him, Bailey's for her. Somehow Syaoran found himself arguing with her over his need for a cigarette, something Sakura firmly refused to give in on.

"Would your ex-wife have been amused, Syaoran-kun?" she argued.

"Yeah, well, we won't know now, will we?" Sourly Syaoran turned his back on her and poured himself a shot which he quickly downed. Then he poured himself another, despite already having had four earlier. _Might as well get plastered,_ he thought.

The shot glass was taken from him. "Hey!" he protested.

"Getting drunk won't help," Sakura said gently. "Why don't you just talk about it?"

Syaoran would never know why he opened up that night, but he did. He told Sakura about Loraina, whom he called Alia in private. He was still in love with her, and Sakura could tell: photos of the beautiful woman were everywhere in the house.

"She seems like a nice person," she began hesitantly.

He laughed bitterly. "She was."

"So how did you meet?" Sakura asked.

Slowly, Syaoran told her the story, with pauses to swig his drink.

_He'd met Loraina quite by accident; they'd both reached for the last bottle of the same brand of expensive Italian tomato sauce at a Tokyo organic gourmet grocery. She said, "You have good taste," then handed it to him, smiling before moving on to the next aisle._

_Syaoran stared after her. He had been flirted with in the past, and he'd never responded; Eriol had gotten to teasing him about being gay as a result. But this woman...she...something about her violet eyes snared Syaoran as he'd never been taken with a woman before. _

_If he cared to acknowledge him, he was helpless with sexual chemistry because he had not really connected with women in the past. Loraina was gorgeous—but that wasn't what attracted him; Syaoran had had beautiful women fling themselves at him before, which was why he wouldn't hear of it when Eriol wanted to sing with him in public. _

_But this woman—she was warm, and she was sweet. Syaoran longed to find out who she was, and why she was the way she was. So he'd done something that had floored Eriol when Eriol found out about it; he followed the beautiful violet-eyed blonde._

"_Hi," he said when he got her attention, and to his shame, his cheeks went pink._

"_Hi," she smiled. Normally she didn't like being hit on by strangers but this handsome amber-eyed man was blushing like a boy, and it made her feel sweet on him._

"_Uh...My name's Syaoran. I know this sounds weird but I...will you go out with me? I promise I'm not some freaky pervert or dirty old man..."_

_She laughed, a soft, tinkling sound that thrilled Syaoran. "You're too young to be a dirty old man, you know. And too good-looking to be a pervert."_

"_Um...heh heh," Syaoran looked down, scuffling his shoes. "I...I'm stammering and I'm babbling. Sorry. I just—will you have dinner with me? Tomorrow? A...at the Tokyo Tenement?" he said, naming a delicious, expensive sushi bar and fusion cuisine cafe. "All on me."_

"_You could ask me my name first," she chided gently._

"_Oh, uh, yeah." Syaoran grinned nervously. "You are?"_

"_I'm Loraina," she said, but Syaoran was fixed on her delicate lips, fighting an insane impulse to kiss her then and there._

"_Ah. Alia," he said, mishearing her name because he wasn't paying attention. "What a beautiful name for such a beautiful woman," he said, then turned red upon realizing how pathetic he sounded._

_Again, she laughed. "Loraina, not Alia," she corrected him. "But I like the sound of Alia."_

"_M...may I call you that?" Syaoran asked shyly. He couldn't keep his eyes off her delicate face, her thick lashes, her tall, slender figure, the lips he wanted to kiss so badly._

_Riveted by the shy, handsome stranger, Loraina looked into his beautiful amber eyes and said yes._

"_I..." Syaoran smiled. "Can I get your number? And where you live?"_

_Syaoran called that very evening; it was almost dawn when they hung up the phone. It felt like love at first sight; they had talked about the things they liked, the things they believed in. Syaoran had never truly connected with a woman before, and this chemistry with Alia overwhelmed him completely._

_When Syaoran picked Loraina—no Alia, he thought—up, she was in a plain shirt and jeans. But she took his breath away; the simple outfit served as a backdrop to her ethereal beauty._

_Loraina took one look at Syaoran in his short-sleeved green polo shirt and jeans, and decided she wanted to date him. He was smart, funny, shy, sweet—he was a dream man. When he took her hand to help her into his car, they both started; their hands tingled at the contact. They had spent dinner quietly talking, with several pauses to look into each other's eyes, and it was only when the waiters pointedly stood at their table to close down the cafe that they finally left._

_In the car, as he took her home, Syaoran could not speak. Alia was affecting him so badly, he wanted to find out why. He didn't know she suffered the same way; she couldn't keep her eyes off his high-cheekboned face, his sensuous lips, his lean body._

"_Would you like coffee?" Alia invited at her doorstep when Syaoran escorted her there._

"_Sure," he said, but started when she laced her fingers through his to guide him in the house. He watched as she made coffee, loving every movement she made._

_As they drank, they were quiet, neither wanting to let the other go. But Alia made the first move as she came to get his cup._

"_I would like to see you again," Alia said, and kissed his cheek gently. She smiled, then was about to go back to her chair when Syaoran stood up._

_Seizing his emotions and putting them on the line, Syaoran pulled her up so her lips could meet his, and he kissed her tenderly. Soon he sent his tongue questing into her mouth, and he found her waiting for him. When she wound her arms around his neck, he became even bolder, and pressed her body against his, letting her feel how much he wanted her._

_And they ended up in her bedroom; Syaoran had carried her there, and proceeded to make love to her. He'd asked her to move in with him after a delirious week of daily dates, and constant lovemaking. He was passionately in love for the first time in his life; he thought of her all the time, sent her flowers and presents daily at the accounting agency where she worked, drove her to and from work—she quickly became the reason why he lived. Her gentleness, her kindness, her genuine concern for him had made him come undone._

_In return she had brought cheer into his life and made his days less grueling. Waking up next to her had been a small joy that made him look forward to mornings. Alia had chided him gently for being so driven and work-centered, luring him out, making him loosen up, letting him feel how much she loved him. So Syaoran began deviating from his daily routine so he could spend time with his beloved._

_As for Alia, she'd never been swept off her feet, and Syaoran's romantic tenderness and sweet possessiveness blew her mind. Because he made love with his emotions fully showing, every night (and sometimes morning) had been like living in paradise. She had only hesitated when he'd proposed marriage after three months._

_He'd made her breakfast; Alia was hopeless in the kitchen, and Syaoran had bravely attempted to eat her cooking when she'd first moved in. But he discovered that the best way to avoid an upset stomach was to do the cooking himself._

_Looking across at her as she smiled at him lovingly, Syaoran had blurted out the first thing on his mind._

"_I love you so much, I can't live without you, Alia. Marry me," he said softly._

"_What?" Her violet eyes widened in shock._

_Syaoran frowned; that wasn't the response he'd expected. "Marry me, little sunshine," he said. It was his intimate nickname for her, one he used only when they made love._

_Alia sat quietly. "We've only been together for three months," she said softly._

"_I love you. You know that," Syaoran said, and indeed she did; he'd said it the first time they made love, and over and over since then._

_It never occurred to him that she had not yet said the words he needed to hear._

"_I know," she smiled. "But this is a big step. Please let me think about it."_

_Disappointed, Syaoran nonetheless agreed and took her to work, reiterating his proposal as he walked her to her office. But, restless and impatient, he dragged a reluctant Eriol with him to buy an engagement ring that very afternoon. "I'll convince her," he'd vowed to a skeptical Eriol. "She'll say yes tonight."_

"_Don't you think you're rushing her?" Eriol said softly when Syaoran agonized over whether to get an amethyst ring, or a diamond one._

"_I'm sure," Syaoran smiled happily. "I've never loved anyone like this—"_

"_Ever." Eriol interrupted. "That's what worries me, Syaoran. You have no experience in love."_

"_She loves me. It will be okay," Syaoran said, ignoring the warning tone in Eriol's voice._

"_Don't rush her," Eriol said. "You slept with her on the first date?"  
_

"_We aren't in the Tokugawa era, Eriol." Syaoran rolled his eyes. "Yes, we made love. Is that a problem?"_

"_Only when you rush into things," Eriol said pointedly.  
_

"_Look, are you my best friend or not?" Syaoran asked in exasperation._

_Eriol took Syaoran firmly by the shoulders. "You made love to her on the first date, you made her move in with you after a week, and you've pretty much dictated the pace of this relationship. You haven't even introduced her to me or to your family!" he said in a hoarse whisper. "Listen to me. While being swept off her feet may have thrilled her, not all women can stay complacent forever."_

"_She loves me, why can't you believe that?" Syaoran snapped._

_"Because she's never said it to you once, has she!" Eriol hissed. "Not once, Syaoran! Not once in your stories in the past three months, and you choose to ignore the truth." The clerks at the expensive jewelry store stared; they recognized Eriol, and were intrigued by the handsome man with him._

_Syaoran flinched and stepped away, glaring with fury. "Of course she loves me. It's completely obvious. Why else would she move in with me, make love to me, be with me, be..."_

_"Maybe she doesn't have a choice when it comes to you. Maybe a fool stole her away, swept her into his fantasy, and she didn't get the chance to protest, because she did like that fool... But she'll run away from you at this rate, Syaoran. You're scaring her off by being possessive, controlling, and aggressive." His blue eyes flashed. "And don't blame me when it ends."_

_Syaoran snarled and was about to lash out when a throat was cleared softly. "Did I come at a bad time?" inquired a soft alto voice, pitched just right to soothe tempers. It was the voice of a woman who could sing beautifully, and later he would find out he was right._

_Violet eyes, darker than Alia's, were the first thing he noticed. The second was the strangely self-possessed dignity the raven-haired woman wore about her—just like Eriol. The third thing Syaoran noticed was that she was not fawning over Eriol as fangirls were wont to do. He'd kissed her cheek in welcome, and she had done the same._

"_Tomoyo Daidouji-san, may I present my best friend Syaoran Li?" Eriol smiled at the beautiful young woman and bowed slightly._

"_I'm sure the pleasure is mine," Tomoyo bowed and smiled gently at Syaoran._

_Confused, Syaoran muttered a greeting, looking suspiciously at the two, who led him off to have lunch. He wound up buying a white gold ring with a diamond at a jeweler Tomoyo recommended._

_That night, he'd waited for Alia outside her office, and kissed her before she had a chance to protest. Then he presented her with the ring._

"_I love you so much, Alia," Syaoran said. "I...please say yes. I can't breathe without you."_

_Alia stared at the ring. _Syaoran doesn't know me that well,_ she realized with a sinking feeling. She sighed inwardly. _If he did, he'd have known I like wearing amber…amber the color of his eyes._ And white gold—she'd never liked it; had Syaoran not noticed how all her jewelry was yellow gold?_

_But he was so deeply in love with her; he never hesitated to show it. How could she refuse such a wonderful man when so many women were looking for someone like Syaoran?_

_Alarm bells went off in her head when she recklessly looked into his eyes and said, "Yes, but on one condition."_

"_Anything," Syaoran promised._

"_If I fall out of love, you will let me go. Swear it!" She was acting on a strange premonition, which she obeyed._

_Syaoran smirked; of course she would stay in love with him, he'd make sure of it. Vaguely he was reminded of a childhood promise he'd made with his cousin Meiling: they had been engaged, and his loophole from her was that he could get out of it if he found someone he loved._

_Luckily for him it was Meiling who had fallen in love with someone else. She was now engaged to their high school friend Aris. Those promises meant nothing, Syaoran thought, and so he gladly made it to Alia._

"_I promise, on my love for you," he said as he slid the ring on her finger and smothered her with kisses. "Let's get married, tomorrow," he said._

"_I..." The alarm bells were back, but Alia accepted his kisses, and said "Yes."_

_They were married in a quickie ceremony at Tokyo City Hall; the only witnesses were Alia's best friend Haruhina, whom Syaoran met for the first time at the ceremony, and a reluctant Eriol. They had enjoyed a honeymoon in Europe; Syaoran blew most of his savings on the trip, which held romantic memories for both him and her._

_Once they came home though, Syaoran did not notice how he was taking his wife's love for granted, and how she was suffering from his illusions, blithely happy in that he was getting his way. He had the woman he wanted, he adored her…his bliss did not allow him to see how he was hurting her._

_He ignored calls from his father and mother, who were both asking him to come home to Hong Kong to see them and to introduce Alia to them. He put off Alia's requests for them to travel to Osaka to meet her family. He ignored Eriol except for work, and he shut off his cousin Meiling, who he used to be close to. Alia was his world, and he felt secure in thinking that they would be enough for each other._

_The end of their marriage had started innocently; he had told her that he wanted a baby to 'complete' their family some time after their first year anniversary. Alia had been silent._

"_Syaoran...Maybe I'm not ready for a baby yet," she said softly._

_Syaoran laughed it off and told her he'd stop buying condoms so she could get pregnant. "You'll love it. Women love being pregnant by the men they love!" he said as he kissed her affectionately. "Besides, you're a housewife now, since you resigned from your job."_

_Alia looked away. She hadn't told him the truth: she had been fired for being absent so often._

_That night, Alia refused Syaoran's advances in bed, and he could have sworn he had heard her crying at some point. The next morning, as they had breakfast, Alia asked for a divorce._

_Syaoran had not taken it well. First he had laughed, disbelieving; everything had been going well, why divorce then? But his soon-to-be ex-wife Alia had patiently explained that while she still loved him as a friend, she was no longer in love with him. Did he want to live out a lie?_

_She remembered everything he'd said. Every act, everything...his passion was something that had scared Alia._

"_Why didn't you tell me?" Syaoran asked._

"_Would you have listened?" Alia was tearful. "Have you ever listened to me? No, do you even __**notice**__ how I feel?"_

_And then she reminded him of his promise. Syaoran had rushed Alia into marriage, ardently swearing she could have her freedom if it didn't work out. Smitten and in love, Alia had agreed on that condition...and Syaoran had forgotten about it._

"_You wanted to own me, Syaoran, don't you understand? I...You call my office thrice a day, and when you feel like it you come over and kidnap me so that we can _**fuck**_ when you want to."  
_

_Syaoran flinched. "Don't say that."_

"_Yes, because __**you**__ don't like it," she muttered. Then she continued, "You think I'm a perfect woman who can't even say bad words. Syaoran, I want to know: do you even know me? Do you even care? What's my favorite color?"_

"_Huh?"_

"_Tell me!" Alia's eyes were filling with tears, and when Syaoran admitted he didn't know, they spilled over.  
_

"_Do you even care about me? You don't listen when I talk, you never ask about my life and my family…all you care about is making love, talking about our future…Do you even realize that I got fired because the boss was annoyed at my never being there to finish projects because my husband kept popping in to take me out?" Alia was crying hard now._

"_I'm sorry!" Syaoran's jaw dropped in horror. "I…"  
_

"_I don't see my friends anymore. You go crazy when I'm not next to you...Syaoran, it...I can't breathe!"_

_Now he remembered Eriol's words from a year ago, right before he'd married Alia._

"Maybe Alia doesn't have a choice. Maybe a fool stole her away, and she didn't get the chance to protest, because she did like that fool... A little. But she'll run away from you at this rate, Syaoran. You're scaring her off by being possessive and aggressive."

"_I..." Syaoran began, "I didn't know. I'm sorry..."_

"_There are so many things about me that you don't know," Alia wailed. "You've made me this perfect lover in your mind. Do you know where I went to high school? Who my friends are? Oh, wait, you never met them, there never is time for it, is there? Don't you find it odd that it's been a year yet I've never met your family?"_

"_I love you!" Syaoran roared. "I...We're still in the honeymoon period. I just want you all to myself for now..."_

"_For a year! Syaoran, don't you see what we're doing to each other? I'm only your lover. I'm not your friend—and you know what? It feels as though you don't even want to know who I really am!" Alia stared deep into the beautiful amber eyes she loved, but...not that way. Not anymore, and she regretted that she'd had a chance to nip this in the bud but didn't—because she had once been madly in love with Syaoran too._

"_Then why did you agree to marry me?"_

"_Syaoran, did you give me a choice in anything?" Alia challenged. "Tell me when I dictated what happens in our relationship."_

_And he couldn't think of an example. _

_Alia looked at him sadly. "You see? You chose to go after me. You seduced me on the first night we met. You insisted that we marry so soon, and you wouldn't let me invite my family and friends. And now you choose when to get me pregnant, and you didn't even see past my hesitation. You...God I was so blind to what you were doing!"_

"_Then we won't have a baby," Syaoran said, confused. "Why are you so upset? You love me too, you said so on our honeymoon..."_

"_After you asked me to," Alia said mournfully. "You said it wasn't fair that you never heard it from me. I..."_

"_So you don't love me?" Syaoran was incredulous._

"_I don't know!" Alia wailed. "You forced me into this!"_

"_I didn't see any objections when we made love," Syaoran pointed out. "And why didn't you say something earlier?"_

"_Because I was swept away!" Alia cried. "Because I..." She laughed hollowly. "I wanted you too...Why else would I have agreed to everything you wanted? I thought I needed someone like you, but now I see we're not growing as people anymore. What happens when you tire of me, when the flame of your passion burns out? Will you discard me? Can you make your passion last?"_

"_Why don't you trust me?" Syaoran was bewildered. "I meant it when I said I would love you forever."_

"_That you can't understand what the problem is..." Alia began to cry. "There it is, Syaoran and you can't see it. You can't see it. You...will never see it..." She was sobbing hard now._

_Syaoran tried to take her in his arms but she pushed him away. "No. No, Syaoran. I can't take this anymore. I'm so sorry."_

_That was when he had begun to scream. Then he had begged, much to his shame. "You can't just leave me! You don't tell someone you love them then change your mind just like that!"_

_Alia was forced to put aside her own feelings to try and comfort Syaoran. "I still love you," she said gently. "But I no longer am in love with you. Remember it was you who offered me my freedom if things didn't work out? It really happens, Syaoran. And it would be utterly unfair and cruel of me to stay if only you are in love with me. It would be like using you because I could not give you the love you need...the love you deserve. If you love me, let me go."_

"_If you love me, then stay!" Syaoran grabbed her shoulders and shook her._

"_Syaoran..." Alia sighed softly. "Love isn't about forcing the other person...and you promised me..."_

"_I refuse to believe it!" Syaoran was drawing blood from his clenched hands; his nails were digging in so deep, they had broken his skin. "I believe love is forever!"_

_Alia sighed, then touched Syaoran's cheek; he was crying, and it hurt her to hurt him. "Syaoran...would you rather have us live a lie? What if I fell in love with someone else? Wouldn't that be even worse? And you love so deeply, Syaoran, that it would be sadistic to accept that love without giving anything back. I believe you are destined to love someone else, to give her all the love and passion you have. Someone who needs you to be that way with her. That someone isn't me though. Would you rather wait until I cheated on you?"_

_To his shame, Syaoran had clung to her, begged her not to leave. Alia had held him until he'd fallen asleep from exhaustion...then when he'd woken up, she was gone, leaving behind a tender letter thanking him for their year together, for all his kindness, and for loving her._

_He'd burned it outside the home they had shared, and immediately placed the house on the market—though he would not move out until the divorce was final._

_The divorce was the worst thing that had happened to him. Alia tried to reach out, to be kind, and constantly sent him letters of apology but Syaoran angrily refused all contact with her. Amazingly she had understood, and sent him a letter apologizing for what had happened. He never responded, and withdrew into his cold, angry shell, giving her their house, everything they had shared in their divorce settlement. Yet he refused to move out—he wanted her to come back and throw him out herself._

_She never did._

_Syaoran dealt with it badly; he'd attempted suicide by drinking poison. Luckily Eriol had found him in time—and since Syaoran was no expert on poisons, it was a simple matter of having his stomach pumped. _

_He'd tried to resist the divorce, but since it was a no-fault, no-support-requested divorce, it was fairly easy for Alia. She had tried to call, tried to send him letters, but he angrily responded that the only thing he wanted to hear was that she was coming back. _

_Incredibly she did not give up, but tried to keep telling him to open his heart, to try and understand what had happened._

_She was the first to open my heart...and the last, he vowed. He had been hurt so badly, only Eriol had been able to prevent him from killing himself again as soon as the divorce was final. Love is a lie...and I hate lies, he told himself bitterly._

_He could not hate Alia as much as he pretended to. He wouldn't see her, wouldn't talk to her—but he'd kept her clothes, her bedroom, her changes to their home intact. He longed for her to walk through the door of the house they had shared and to say, "Syaoran, I'm home—for good."_

_Because Syaoran still loved her, despite her constant insistence on him moving on to find "the one he was destined for" whenever she talked to Eriol—his only means of finding out about what she was doing these days...he still loved her._

_And it had been two years since she had been gone. _

"So that's it, right there. She lied to me," Syaoran said, tossing back another shot.

Sakura have him a measuring glance. "You find it easier to blame her, not yourself. Why can't you see what happened? You have trouble dealing with your emotions and so you lash out…"

Syaoran stood up, eyes blazing. "Are you trying to psychoanalyze me?"

Sakura was nervous; she hadn't seen him this angry before, but she faced him. "Yes. I know you hate that but you have to hear it from me. Who else can tell you?"

"What makes you think you're superior when it comes to relationships?" Syaoran snarled.

"I never said I was! But it's been two years. You need to move on, and you need to hear where you went wrong so you can move on!" Sakura stood her ground.

"Yeah? Well, not everyone can be as innocent or naïve as you are, as accepting of the world. You led a happy life, no major traumas, no real heartbreaks," he spat at her. "Growing up in that ideal home with a loving dad and brother—you don't know what pain is."

Sakura flinched; Syaoran did not know her secret pain from her past, and this was not the time to tell him, not when he was being angry and snide. "That's what you think," she said quietly.

"Yeah, you probably didn't make prom queen in high school, what a tragedy, oh the humanity," Syaoran sneered. It was his favorite way of coping: lashing out when things didn't go his way.

Sakura had merely smiled, though the smile didn't reach her eyes. "Everyone has some kind of pain, Syaoran-kun. Sometimes we need to get past it the best way we know how. But I've always told myself that everything will be all right. Somehow. It's hard to keep believing that—I know, boy do I know. But Syaoran-kun," and she looked earnestly into his eyes, "whatever your pain is, I think it's easier if we can share it."

And she smiled.

A nasty comment died on his lips when she touched his arm. Why was he being so hostile anyway? Sakura had never done anything to deserve his hostility, which he used as armor to keep people away from him. Syaoran had never been comfortable with talking about or dealing with his feelings.

As a child he'd learned that running away was the best way to avoid feelings and confrontations; in fact, right now, he was tempted to walk out the door. Except this was his house, after all.

Instead, he would never know why he chose to crack his first joke then—had he known how it would set the tone of their relationship, he would have done so earlier.

"Oh so the real Sakura comes out. Pretty Pollyana," he taunted.

He yelped when she'd slapped his arm for the first time.

She clapped her hands to her mouth and apologized immediately to Syaoran, who was unable to resist the urge to make another joke.

"I accept the apology from the tomboy who hits men."

"Syaoran-kun!" Outraged, Sakura hit his arm again, and when he ran to avoid her, she ran after him.

A few more hits later, they were laughing helplessly. When they calmed down, Sakura cleared her throat.

"Syaoran-kun…You're a good guy. You just…I don't know, but you made a mistake with Alia. Fine, but it's not the end of the world. What if someone falls in love with you, someone who loves you, truly, and you end up shutting her out? You have to let go, and you have to move on."

Syaoran said nothing; while it still irritated him, he knew deep inside that she was telling him what he needed to hear.

"And I'm going to help you," Sakura continued, smiling at him. "All right?"

"Is there a point to helping people who don't want to be helped?" he asked scornfully.

"Yes. Yes, I believe so," Sakura said quietly, "because if one person you trust doesn't give up on you, you've got to eventually ask yourself why that person doesn't give up on you, and you're going to see that you are worth it."

He merely looked at her, saying nothing again, but beginning to get thoughtful. He would reflect on her words for a long time to come.

For Syaoran, their friendship was like finding the one person who could understand what was in his heart and never think him weak for it. Sakura also got to talk about the pain of her past relationships--though she hesitated with the details. He had yet to drag the full stories of her love life out of her and when he did, he would be horrified by how badly love had treated her. Syaoran discovered he enjoyed teasing Sakura, and he slowly came out of his shell with her.

On the other hand, Sakura liked the challenge of getting Syaoran to be less angry, less sullen. It was like having Toya with her again, and Syaoran made her feel safe. His company was a welcome relief from the tense relationships in the past, and her hurts tended to fade away when they played, bickered, ate, and even exercised together.

For both of them, it felt good to be able to open up to someone who wasn't asking them to 'get over it' or 'move on'...or worse, trying to set them up with someone else. Talking about Alia and Emile and, Syaoran later discovered, Kito was cathartic for them; Syaoran felt the thorn in his chest lifting a bit, and Sakura began to regain her optimism and cheerfulness. Getting Syaoran to open up was like a pleasant game for Sakura, because he reminded her of her brother: gruff, grumpy, and even rude on the surface, but kind and shy with a rare wit if you could peer past the facade.

He on the other hand liked Sakura's cheerfulness, even though he knew that sometimes she forced the happy face on. She never judged him, and seemed to actually appreciate his presence. Her attitude was infectious, and Syaoran found that he could smile when he was in her presence. Together, they had found the comfort that was lacking in their lives.

* * *

Early that winter, Sakura started working at the Entertainment Network. She noticed her very handsome silver-haired boss Yue Lim, the son of the owner, immediately—she couldn't miss the smoldering looks he was giving her, and she was thrilled—especially after he asked her out a month into her employment.

"He's probably gay," Syaoran said as he stirred his coffee at the Cat's Eye Café. "What's with the long hair? I bet your brother would never approve of him; if I'm the Brat then Yue would be The Fag." He chortled.

"He is not, and don't be hateful," Sakura chided him.

"It's dangerous to date a boss," Syaoran warned.

"At least I have a date."

"Like I care about being dateless?" Syaoran leaned back and felt in his pockets before he remembered that he'd left his cigarettes at home.

"Ha!" Sakura was triumphant. "You're giving up on that filthy habit!"

"Am not," he retorted. "I just…forgot."

She grinned, and he knew she knew. Nonetheless, he issued a few more warnings about Yue—which Sakura blissfully ignored—before taking his leave.

A few nights later, Yue took Sakura out to the lounge of a swanky hotel. He'd proven to be dryly witty, funny, and thrilling to be with; he'd sent Sakura into orbit when he kissed her hand and bade her goodbye after he took her home in his Aston Martin. Then he'd called her as soon as she arrived home, and they had talked for an hour. Sakura began exchanging funny and silly text messages with him, thrilled because he was just so—romantic. When roses appeared at her doorstep a few days later, Sakura floated on a high for the next week.

Yue, for his part, was intrigued by the beautiful auburn-haired, green-eyed beauty. She had laughing, sparkling eyes, and was almost inordinately cheerful. And, big bonus, she treated him like a regular guy. He had flirted openly with Sakura when she began working for his company, taken by her sweet appearance, her smile, her innocence.

After six months, Sakura let Yue kiss her, and they became a couple. She worried so much after Yue had first kissed her, and he had not left or chosen to cheat on her...in fact, he was sexy and sweet.

"…and when he kisses me, I could just…"

"Ugh. Spare me," Syaoran rolled his eyes.

"You're rude!" Sakura declared. "He's a gentleman, much unlike some other Chinese guys I could name."

"And who's that?" Syaoran baited.

She rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Third time lucky, they say," and she smiled. "Come on, Syaoran, show some enthusiasm."

"How can I be enthusiastic when this dick made you bail out on lunch with me the last time?" Syaoran complained.

"He makes me happy," Sakura reached out and took Syaoran's hand. "He really does. Can't you be happy for me?"

Syaoran eyed her, then shrugged. "All right. You two will be happy, you'll marry, have a dozen ugly gay kids and live happily ever after. Happy now? … Ouch!"

She had slapped his arm, and when he tried to retaliate, she giggled and threatened to upend a pitcher of juice on his head. They called a truce, and later, Sakura said, "I'm sorry I don't see you that often, but I'll try to set you up too…"

"Fuck no," Syaoran said crudely. "Look, I'm happy for you. Just…just leave me alone on that. Okay?"

"Okay…" she said uncertainly. "Oh dear, I've got to go now."

"Take a cab. I already paid for lunch," Syaoran said.

"Oooh, so not fair! How did you do that this time?"

"Not telling you my secrets," Syaoran grinned. "Now go, get back to your office and your gay boyfriend…" He dodged the slap to his arm.

"Quit it!"

"Just telling the truth," Syaoran said. "Now go on!"

Once Sakura left, the owner of the Cat's Eye Café, Fay Flourite, presented Syaoran with the bill. Syaoran paid up with his credit card.

"Good idea for you to talk to me first about the bill. You two are adorable when you argue about it," Fay smiled.

"Tactics, plain and simple," Syaoran smirked.

"I can't help but overhear she's seeing someone."

Syaoran shrugged; now that Sakura had left, he could sneak the cigarettes out from his pockets. "Yeah, she is. Good for her."

"Don't you feel you should be dating her yourself, Syaoran-kun?" Fay smiled.

Syaoran looked up and gave him a wilting look. "Please."

The older man smiled. "Perhaps now is not the time for you to change your mind."

"On what?" Syaoran paused in lighting a cigarette.

"Changing your habits…and your mindset. You see," and Fay cheerfully removed the cigarette from Syaoran's hand and snuffed it, tossing it into the dirty dishes and ignoring Syaoran's protests, "you're not the only one who talked to me in advance. Sakura-chan told me not to let you light up a single cigarette…and to hand over the pack you have hidden in your socks."

Syaoran groaned and raised his hands in surrender. "Fine," he grumbled and threw the pack at Fay. "I give up." He stood up, left a tip, and walked to where he had parked his BMW.

"Those two." Fay smiled; he watched them with interest whenever they came to his café. "Those two can really warm the heart." He hummed a love song as he cleared their table, confident that Syaoran and Sakura would eventually realize their feelings for each other.

* * *

**In Chapter 3:** _Sakura has heartache to deal with, and tries to hide it from Syaoran. Someone unexpected pays a visit._

**Notes (EDITED)  
**

In Japan and many parts of Asia, it is normal for people to stay with their parents until they marry--and sometimes even after they do. Grown adults living with parents doesn't have the same stigma in Asia as it does in Europe and the US.

I gave hints in the original story that Sakura already knew that Tomoyo and Touya were in love. She may be dense but she also can be oddly sympathetic to those who need to hide their affairs (such as Rika and Terada-sensei).

I know Syaoran does not smoke (and I don't like it myself) but as I mentioned earlier, it's going to be a sort of "battleground" for him and Sakura ^_^

"Pollyana" is a reference to a positive, cheerful girl who always thought the best of every situation.

Thank you to everyone who reviewed! I try to answer each review if I can, when I can, but if I don't, it doesn't mean I'm not grateful; please accept a hug and a kiss from Syaoran (hehe). Thank you **DN Angel and Cardcaptor Sakura **(first, thanks!)**, Jusenkyo, lhaine07, lizziele, anigal08, Wings of Wind, AngelEmCutie, yoimnao, smile4meeh, broken emerald, vlakimir, Enigma infinite, DineyBlue, mystic emeralds, cupid17, EmpKaylenatye, Hime Kimiko, puasloma, Julia and Tania, Shahar Mystral, Nadja100, vreni, XxButterflyxAngelxLover, **and** Yingfa Dreamer.**


	3. Heartbreak

**A Shelter for Broken Hearts (Slowly, Sweetly Redux) **

**Summary:** Sometimes the brokenhearted take comfort in each other—and love has a way of blossoming from friendship.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own the CCS characters but this plot is mine.

**A note:** The problem with the copied part of last chapter is over. It is now between me and the person concerned, and was not deliberate, as an apology has been issued and the entry taken down. I thank her for straightening things out, and I would also like to thank everyone who helped me through this with encouraging messages and the like.

By the way, if you would like to repost my work or part of it elsewhere, translate it, or whatever, please just let me know, and don't forget to acknowledge me. I have no problem with you printing out the story or saving it on your hard drive or linking to it on your blog or website or whatever—I mean, wow, if you do that, that would be awesome if you like my story that much! Thanks!

See, I keep my promises. This rewrite has been on schedule for these chapters! See you again next weekend for Chapter 4, and please do leave me a review (: Constructive criticism is always welcome; in fact the reason why my writing is improving is because of mystic emeralds, Julia and Tania, Diney Blue, and all of you who take time out to review and let me know what I can do to improve. Thanks! I'll send Syaoran over to hug you tonight ^_^ but he comes back to me afterwards, OK? (Kidding, don't I wish?)

* * *

**Chapter 3: Heartbreak**

For Sakura, the relationship with Yue made her feel like her long wait for true love was finally over. Yue was intelligent, sweet, and passionate, and he displayed none of the qualities that Emile and Kito (someone Sakura pushed to the back of her mind always) did. And he made her feel so happy; even the worst of work days became better with just a smile or gentle gesture from him.

The first time they made love, they were alone in his office late at night, and they were working on an ad campaign when he suddenly swept all the papers on his office table aside.

"Yue...What..." was all Sakura got out before he seized her and pinned her to his desk. Then his lips came crashing down on hers in a passionate, delicious kiss.

"God...How am I supposed to focus with you around? You're a beautiful distraction, baby," Yue groaned, then sent his tongue into her mouth. He kissed his way down to her neck, and Sakura, momentarily afraid, tried to push him away out of fear of a repeat of what had happened with her high school boyfriend.

But why was she feeling so excited, so eager to let Yue touch her? Why was her body begging for his touch?

She shivered and squeaked, "No, wait, please…"

"What?" Yue raised his gray eyes, dark with his feelings, to hers. "No...are you a virgin?" He stroked her cheeks gently, kissing her forehead.

"No...but..." Sakura took a deep breath, fighting her tears. "I..."

Miraculously, Yue understood, and folded Sakura tenderly into his arms. "You had a bad first time, didn't you?" Yue breathed. "What kind of asshole wouldn't give you heaven when you gave your virginity to him?"

"I..." Sakura swallowed, not wanting to cry. "He pretty much forced me into it, and luckily he was done in five minutes."

Yue looked at her incredulously. "Five…_minutes?_ Five freaking minutes?" He threw his head back and laughed; Sakura blushed. Was he laughing at her inexperience?

"I...I think it was my fault, I didn't have experience, I..." She shut up when Yue pulled her close, kissing her forehead, her nose, then slowly, her lips, drugging Sakura with a sweet, slow, sensual kiss which had his tongue sliding gently over hers. He pressed his body against hers, and she gasped; she could feel him against her and...he wanted her.

"I'm not laughing at you, Sakura, sweet baby. I'm laughing at that pathetic loser who didn't understand that you're the kind of woman who deserves to be made sweet love to for hours on end."

Tears started in Sakura's eyes; the memory of her high school boyfriend Kito was something she tried not to bring up. She'd pretty much tried to forget what he had done to her, and now…Yue was saying what Tomoyo had been telling her all along. Still, she could not bring herself to tell Yue the truth about her first time.

Yue spoke into her ear in a low husky voice. "So...I'm just going to have to make up for that idiot, aren't I?" He picked Sakura up in his arms, despite her protests, and carried her to the elevator, where he continued to kiss her. Thrills ran over Sakura's body; her first time with Kito had been nothing compared to this...drowning sweetness.

"Someone might see," Sakura gasped as Yue nipped her earlobes.

"I love you, and I don't care," Yue breathed. His driver pulled up with his limousine, and he whispered tenderly in Sakura's ear, "My place. I want you not to worry. I'll take care of you." He held her gently in his arms, kissing her forehead, kissing her lips, slowly arousing feelings in Sakura that she thought were dead.

Those feelings she had read about in romance novels—_maybe they were real after all_, she thought, as she twined her fingers in Yue's long silver hair.

"You're going to know what real lovemaking is like," Yue whispered against her lips. "Five minutes times ten...longer, even..." he said as he stroked her neck. "Your first time—I'm going to erase that memory, baby."

At his large home, Yue continued to kiss Sakura as they entered the door. He was whispering things that were driving her crazy. He complimented her skin, he kissed her eyelids, he told her that he'd been wanting to touch her ever since he saw her. And he himself believed it; he saw Sakura as the most beautiful thing he'd ever had the pleasure of making love to.

So when they made it to the bed, Sakura was breathless with desire. Yue then spent the night showing her why it was called lovemaking, and Sakura found out what it meant to reach the heights of pleasure—over and over and over again.

After the fourth time, lying in Yue's arms, she thrilled when he kissed her and said, "God, I love you. You're so beautiful." Then he'd pulled her into his arms and they had fallen asleep...like true lovers.

For the first time in her life, Sakura could now giggle away with Tomoyo and compare notes on being made love to. Tomoyo could not bear to tell Sakura about her reservations, not when she was so happy, finally.

Sakura would attack Yue when they were alone; she had discovered she had a sensual side which Yue enjoyed. She had discovered full-blown love for the first time in her life, and enjoyed Yue's passion in bed. He told her constantly that he loved her, and showed it in many ways: showering her with presents, checking on her constantly.

One night, after their second month anniversary, they had made love then he'd given her a pair of gorgeous, sinfully expensive emerald earrings.

"See, they're emeralds surrounded by diamonds," Yue said as he placed them on her. "The diamonds are me, and the emeralds are you. If you look at it, it's me protecting you, loving you."

Sakura had cried for joy, and Yue held her close, whispering that he loved her...forever. They made very passionate love that night and Sakura floated about in a sea of joy for the rest of the week.

"Yue, darling?" she said after one blissful evening of lovemaking.

"Mmm?" He was nuzzling her neck.

"I…can I say something?"

"Anything." He kissed her gently.

"I…" Sakura took a deep breath, "I've never met your friends or family. We've been together for some time now; shouldn't we…"

Yue hugged Sakura, pressing her to his chest. He kissed her head absently. How could he explain to Sakura that while he loved her, he did not want to get in too deep with her? She was fun to be around with, someone he cared deeply about, but meeting his family and friends was tantamount to declaring his intention to marry her. Nobody had ever passed his pureblooded Chinese parents' test for potential wives, and Yue, pragmatist that he was, did not want to rock the boat; he could be disinherited if he did.

"I'll gladly meet your family," he said, hoping it would work.

"Really?" She propped herself up, eyes sparkling in happiness.

"Yes, how about this Sunday at the Hei Fung Terrace in Imperial Hotel in Tokyo? Reservations and dinner are on me. I'll have my secretary Nakuru take care of that."

Indeed, Yue would pay any price to avoid going in too deep. He knew he wasn't ready to commit that deeply to Sakura. Yes, he loved her, but he was interested in seeing her family and friends. Plus, it didn't hurt that Hei Fung was very pricey and would impress her family if he picked up the bill.

"Oooh!" Sakura squealed, and hugged Yue. "That's wonderful!"

It did not occur to her that Yue had sidestepped her original question, not in her happiness. And Yue smiled. Crisis averted. She would stay by his side.

* * *

To Syaoran's annoyance, his lunches with Sakura became fewer and farther between because she was dating Yue openly now. He would never admit it, but he missed her: her laughter, the way she listened to him, how she got him to open up, how just gosh darned **nice** she was to have around.

He had no idea that he wasn't alone in being concerned about that development. Tomoyo and Eriol, who had hoped to matchmake him and Sakura, reserved judgment on Yue because Sakura seemed so happy with him.

And had he known that his father knew what was going on, he would have been very surprised, and pleased.

But Syaoran had been thinking of things ever since he and Sakura had had it out over Loraina. Irritated as he was, her words took root, and he had found some wisdom in introspection.

_Maybe I did drive Alia away, _he thought. Sakura had carefully pointed out Syaoran's acts of possessiveness and other failings in the relationship, then asked about his previous relationships. Syaoran was too embarrassed to admit that he'd had a purely sexual relationship with one girl in high school, and no other serious relationships or even dates since then, so he'd merely said he hadn't had any relationship experience.

And Sakura had told him to think about things, see things from Loraina's point of view, even to the extent of asking Syaoran to demonstrate and she would play Loraina's part. He was surprised when Sakura pointed out how possessive he was, how he had forced his will on his ex-wife, and how selfish he had been in her responses to his actions.

That had forced Syaoran to think things through a little more thoroughly…and he was slowly realizing how he had driven Loraina away. What was harder for him was knowing he had ruined things himself; Sakura had pointed out how desperately Loraina had tried to save their marriage by hiding things and pretending everything was okay.

So, as usual, he was wrestling things through musically. He had gathered his thoughts, and they came together as a song. He finished it in time for his weekly conference with Eriol, and when Eriol arrived at Syaoran's studio, Syaoran showed him the lyrics.

"_Since you left me, I never really tried to put my life back where it should belong, and I've always let the past come back. I'm realizing that it could be wrong. But now I finally know I have to let it go to make way for a brighter tomorrow. So now I'm leaving yesterday behind, and finally I've made up my mind to let the memories stay away and think about today. I'm leaving yesterday behind 'cause now I'll try to live my life once more just the way I did before. Since I know that I never will forget the memories that made my yesterday. But I will try not to let it interfere with the choices I will make along the way, 'cause I'm not living in a world of fantasy; I'm here now in the world of reality…" _**(1)**

"Hmmm," Eriol said as he tried the notes of the melody out on Syaoran's beautiful grand piano's keyboard. "This is strangely positive coming from you."

"Will it suit you, though?" Syaoran asked. "You said you were theming your next album as songs of rebirth and this kind of isn't it."

"Never hurts for the Prince of Tokyo to have a moony love song or two," Eriol playfully baited Syaoran.

He bit. "It is not moony!"

"Calm down. I know. But Syaoran…does this mean this is the beginning of the end for your, ah, mournful love song compositions?"

"I don't know," Syaoran mused out loud. "It's just something that kind of came out."

The song, which Syaoran had titled "Leaving Yesterday Behind," was more than just that. It was a message, Eriol knew, and he decided he would carefully coax the story out of his best friend.

"Perhaps you're ready to move out of your old house, then, just as your lawyer has been advising," Eriol began.

"Maybe. Too many memories," Syaoran said.

"If you get a new place, you can quit sleeping in the guest room," Eriol said. "The last time I was there, I noticed some of your photos of Alia—I mean, Loraina, were not there anymore."

Syaoran paused before answering, "I know. Sometimes I feel it's time to let go. "

Eriol tensed. It was the first time in two years Syaoran had mentioned anything about moving on. "And why is that so?" he asked.

"I just…" Syaoran stared off into space. "Sakura and I have been talking about Alia. Remember how I nearly killed you when you cleared out her dressing room, and only Daidouji saved you?"

Eriol raised one brow. "I'm not filing charges, obviously, since you were unsuccessful," he joked. "But truly, Syaoran, what has Sakura-san said?"

Syaoran drew a deep breath before answering, "That…That maybe I drove Alia away."

_That statement cost a lot for him to say, _Eriol thought. He was proud of Syaoran for reaching that point of realization, and of Sakura for guiding Syaoran to it. In truth he had bet Tomoyo that Sakura would be the one—the only one—who could make Syaoran realize it.

Perhaps now, as Tomoyo had predicted, things would turn for the better.

Out loud he said, "I see. And what do you think?"

Syaoran shook his head as if to clear it. "I think…I think she was right."

"Ah."

"Eriol, there are so many whys and buts and ifs in my head right now, and I don't know…I wish I'd said something then, that I'd seen it coming, that…But you know what confuses me more?"

He knew what Syaoran wanted him to say, and so he said it. "You don't know if you want to go back to a point in time when you could have taken it all back, and you don't know why you don't want to try again with Loraina."

"Exactly." Syaoran sighed. "I…When Loraina first left, I…well, you know I tried to kill myself. It was like just taking a breath was pain, every moment without her was like…God I don't know, just that it was so fucking **hard** to be without her."

Eriol wanted to say that if Syaoran had just talked to someone, opened up and told them what he was feeling inside, then perhaps things would not have been so bad. But ever since they had been children, Syaoran had not been the kind to say anything when he was upset; he tended to run off, find a hiding place, sulk, or just get angry. Often, many conflicts had started over Syaoran's refusal to say anything, and Eriol had often chided him on needing to take responsibility by speaking up and communicating with others.

Which was what he was doing now.

"But now I don't think of her all the time anymore. Sometimes I just think of what to make for dinner, what instrument to use for a song, if that thing I see will make a nice photo, should I get that shirt, what can I say to annoy Sakura with…and it feels strange. Like suddenly the world is different and you can't put your finger on it…but it just is." Syaoran said, his tone light with wonderment.

Eriol smiled; that was a mouthful coming from the normally taciturn Syaoran. And…he had called Alia "Loraina." Her real name, at last.

"Syaoran, heartbreak is like that. You never really suffered it, so now that you're this old and you suddenly have it happen to you…of course you came unhinged a bit."

Raising an eyebrow, Syaoran wryly joked, "A bit?"

"There is such a thing as diplomacy, you know," Eriol chuckled.

"Yeah, well." Syaoran looked over the song. "Want me to arrange this with strings?"

"Mmm, maybe we'll leave it be for now, with your piano arrangement." Eriol smiled; now he had something interesting to report to Tomoyo…and Syaoran's father: a real development.

They discussed his upcoming album, and Syaoran gave Eriol copies of the arrangements he'd done. Eriol teased him about the jingle Syaoran had done for an ice cream company, and Syaoran protested that it paid quite well. In addition to writing and arranging for Eriol, Syaoran had a side business of TV and radio commercial jingles going. He was comfortable and happy.

"I was wondering…if you didn't have the interest from your trust fund from the Lis, would you go into any other line of work? You haven't used your business school degree yet," Eriol asked. He was interested in Syaoran's answer because he'd received a hint from Syaoran's father, Yong Song Li, that he might change his will.

"I don't know. I'll burn the bridge when I get there," Syaoran joked, and Eriol groaned at the mixed metaphor. "But I have some investments and stuff. My dad is fine, and since my eldest sister, Achi Fuutie, is running the company, there's no real pressure on me."

"Ah, so." Eriol made a tiny smile with his lips. "Well, see you next week then."

When he left, Syaoran continued playing a bit, aimlessly developing melodies for his digital recorder to pick up. He was thinking of Sakura again, and wondering why he disliked her new boyfriend without even meeting him. He stopped playing the piano when the ringtone he assigned to Sakura went off on his cellphone.

"Syaoran-kun, hi!"

Warily Syaoran said, "Are you bailing out on lunch tomorrow _again_?"

Sakura protested, "You make it sound like it's all I do!"

"Uh-huh. No, you don't. Just half the time."

"Syaoran-kun! That is so not true!"

"Yeah, right, whatever." Syaoran grumbled.

"Look, Syaoran, I called to invite you to dinner this weekend with my family and Tomoyo-chan." Sakura sounded giddy with happiness.

"Uh huh," Syaoran said skeptically. "What's the catch? I have to play nice to your big brother?"

Sakura's voice was high-pitched in her enthusiasm. "No. I want to introduce you and Tomoyo-chan and my family to Yue!"

Syaoran raised an eyebrow, though the gesture was futile. "Right. And I should care _**why**_?"

She sighed. "Don't you see? He wants to meet the family and my friends. It's serious!"

"Huh." Syaoran grunted. Sounded serious, all right. He bet Yue would bail; he knew that kind of Chinese heir all too well. He wasn't one of those, but it annoyed him when others were.

"Syaoran-kun…Are you mad at me?" Sakura asked.

He paused before answering, "No. Not at you."

"Then why aren't you happy for me?"

"I don't like him," Syaoran said straightforwardly, paying Sakura the compliment of not hiding his true feelings.

"You sound like my onii-chan," Sakura complained. "What have you got against Yue?"

"Look, I told you, I have no problem with you dating him, but one, he's your boss. No office romance ever goes right, for a reason. People might talk behind your back and what happens when he dumps you? Two, he's traditional Chinese, and you remember, I warned about that. I should know, I'm Chinese too! His family comes first and if trouble comes up over him dating you—and it will, believe me, because you're Japanese—**you're** the one he'll dump. And strike three, it takes him this long after sleeping with you to want to meet your family? You've been dating what, eight months now. Sakura, why only now?"

"Syaoran-kun," Sakura began. "Please…It's complicated. He's trying his best."

"So you say," Syaoran said. He'd heard Sakura's explanations of what Yue had told her and as far as he was concerned, they all came down to two syllables: _**bull**_and_**shit**_. Not all Chinese families were as strict as Yue made them out to be; Syaoran himself came from an old, wealthy Chinese family, and his older sisters had married whomever they pleased. But Sakura, in love and enchanted with Yue, refused to listen to Syaoran's warnings.

_Stupid Yue__,_ he thought, and vowed to be unpleasant to the man when they ever met. He didn't want Sakura hurt, and so he wanted to be the one to strike out for her.

He was already planning the snide things he would say. "Nice hair. How long does it take to dry?" Or maybe, "Oh so you're Sakura's third boyfriend. Guess third time lucky doesn't apply to your case."

Either way, when he arrived at the Imperial Hotel, he was already in a foul mood. It didn't help that he was seated right next to Sakura's brother, who favored him with a glare when he arrived. He noticed how Tomoyo Daidouji and Touya Kinomoto practically smoldered with sexual chemistry, and how Sakura and her father both pretended not to know.

Sakura, he was sure, was pretending ignorance because she did not want anyone hurt; Syaoran knew Touya was in a relationship with Yukito Tsukishiro, and the two lived together. He didn't know what Tomoyo Daidouji's reason for hiding was, but he figured it was none of his business.

Syaoran passed the time by talking to Fujitaka Kinomoto; the conversation was quite enjoyable, as Fujitaka was considering a new expedition in the Philippines.

"Do you know that archaeology in the Philippines has many brilliant minds but they have to fight the government for the preservation of important sites? Plus the government participated in several hoaxes in the past, staining the reputation of Philippine archaeologists. It's so sad!"

"Why can't they organize?" Syaoran asked.

"Infighting. Jealousy. Competition." Fujitaka ticked off the reasons on his hands.

"Kind of like when a pack of wolves is starving, they tend to turn on one another," Syaoran said.

"Correct, Li-kun. Unfortunately, with the prize being research grants and facilities. I'd like to help out, and I've contacted the anthropology department of the state university and several other schools, so I've arranged for several grants." Fujitaka decided not to mention that they would be coming out of his pocket; he'd taken out a loan and used his home as collateral. "Touya-kun and Tsukishiro-kun are coming with me next month to serve as project directors."

Had he known how his decision would affect Sakura, he might have reconsidered.

"I hope you succeed, Kinomoto-san," Syaoran smiled. "Maybe in the future I could invest in those grants?"

"That would be good," Fujitaka smiled. "As long as you join us."

"May I?" Syaoran smiled broadly.

"Of course."

Sakura smiled to see Syaoran so engrossed in conversation with her father, but kept watch on the door. Yue was still not there, but he had confirmed with her earlier that morning, so she felt confident.

"Problems?" Tomoyo asked.

"No, no," Sakura smiled. "Oh, Tomoyo, I am so happy he agreed. Maybe this is the start of something wonderful. Third time lucky, you know."

Tomoyo opened her mouth, but after a glance from Touya, she smiled and said, "Yes, perhaps."

It was only when Touya raised his voice that they noticed that Yue was fifteen minutes late without any word from him—quite inappropriate by Japanese standards. Sakura was getting embarrassed as the waiters kept inviting them to order, but they couldn't as their host was not present; the reservations were in Yue's name, after all.

"Where's that guy?" Touya complained. None of them were willing to order without him, but they were already hungry. "How rude is that? What could possibly be keeping him?"

"Good question. Brushing his hair?" Syaoran cracked.

"Hey Sakura. He has a point. Marry him instead," Touya pointed at Syaoran.

"You paying me?" Syaoran retorted.

"Like anyone else would have you?" Touya fired back.

"Onii-chan! Syaoran-kun!" Sakura glared at them.

"I can't believe my little sister is going out with a guy who's gayer than me," Touya sniped.

Syaoran choked on his water. Gay? But he could have sworn…

Touya shot him an angry glare. "Got a problem with gay people?"

"No," was all Syaoran said. He looked at Tomoyo, who merely smiled at him sweetly.

"Sakura says you call her boyfriend gay," Touya challenged.

"And I apologize to all gay men when I say that. If you ever saw what he wears…"

"What, you met him before us?" Touya said.

"No but Daidouji over there has quite the photo collection," Syaoran said calmly.

"Oh right, I've seen it too." Touya looked at Tomoyo. "Why you'd even bother photographing that guy…"

"I'd say waste of film, but since we use memory cards now, I'd say he isn't worth a pixel," Syaoran chortled.

"Assuming you can fit his big head into the frame," Touya chuckled.

"The hair!" Syaoran and Touya both began to laugh.

"Seriously, who wears hair that long these days?" Syaoran snorted.

"Maybe his beauty is all there; cut it and he turns into a wimpy guy named Yabu," Touya laughed; a "yabu" was a quack doctor and the name was associated with wimpy men.

"He'll be here. Stop it, you two," Sakura hissed at Touya and Syaoran. "We are not in a playground. Act mature, will you?"

"How many Chinese brats do I have to meet anyway?" Touya gritted his teeth. "And why do we have to wait because he's late? How much respect does he hold for you if he can do this?" he asked pointedly.

"Hey, I'm the brat. Yue's just the dork," Syaoran said.

"He's busy, all right?" Sakura hissed. She glanced at her phone; no messages or missed calls from Yue.

Twenty. Twenty five minutes. Touya and Syaoran had begun a tirade against Yue, and Sakura escaped to make a call.

Yue did not pick up until after she had dialed thrice.

"Oh thank God Yue! We…are you all right? We've been waiting and…"

"My mother called," Yue said. "I'm heading for the main mansion of the Lims."

"W…what?" Sakura was floored. "But you promised…and we're at the Imperial Hotel already…you said earlier that you…"

"I know, Sakura baby girl, but please understand, this is my family…"

"This is my family too!" Sakura hissed. "Why…"

"Look, I'll make it up to you. Put it all on my tab; I'll text you my credit card number," Yue said. He dropped his voice to the sexy register. "We'll make love, I promise baby."

"But Yue…"

He cut the call, leaving Sakura gaping. How could he?

Her phone's message tone bleeped. Yue had sent his credit card number to Sakura with the words, "Sky's the limit. Am sure that'll be a super treat for your family!"

Insulted, Sakura raised her chin and decided to put up a brave front, marching back into the restaurant.

"Oh there you are, Sakura-san," Fujitaka called out. "How is Yue-san?"

Swallowing, Sakura put on a cheery smile. "He called to apologize but his family…uh, had an emergency."

Syaoran sent a hard stare at Sakura, which she ignored. Touya said, "Coward. Bet that's an excuse." He looked at Syaoran as if waiting for confirmation.

"No bet," Syaoran said slowly. "He probably doesn't really have a family em-…"

"He can't make it but dinner will be on him," Sakura talked over Syaoran's words. "Come on, let's order!" Sakura chattered throughout the meal, smiling and cheerfully telling everyone stories about Yue, ignoring Tomoyo's sad looks and Touya's mockery of Yue's cowardice.

Harder to avoid were Syaoran's pointed stares. With a sinking feeling, Sakura realized that he knew the truth. Frantically she joked through the meal, ate more food than she wanted, and paid the bill in secret—using her own credit card, even though she could ill afford what amounted to half a month's salary for the meal.

Her family left first, Touya offering to take Tomoyo home, as she expected. She tried to escape before Syaoran could say anything, but his hand came down on her arm.

"I told you…" he began.

"He's busy," Sakura snapped, wrestling her arm out of Syaoran's grasp.

"Why are you covering up for that jerk?" Syaoran stood his ground.

"He's not a jerk!" Sakura said.

"Asshole, then. Come on! I'm not stupid. Your dad was distracted, so he missed it. I kept talking to him for that purpose, all right? Your brother was making goo-goo eyes at your best friend, and they both pretended they missed it. But damn it Sakura stop pretending Yue didn't back out…"

"Look, just drop it," Sakura raised her hands. "Okay? You don't know what he said…"

"I don't have to know exactly what that bastard said!" Syaoran roared. The others in the restaurant stared at him, so he lowered his voice. "I just know he backed out on you. And you know what? I have to tell you that his family is just one excuse that he'll keep using because you don't belong in his pureblooded world. Why can't you just…"

"And then what, Syaoran?" Sakura asked, her cheeks reddening. "You going to taunt me? You going to tell me I can't make good choices? Come on, Syaoran, tell me what happens. Is there any point to discussing this? I know what he did. I'm an idiot. Fine! So can we just drop it?"

"Why are you so damned stubborn?" Syaoran asked. All he wanted was for Sakura to just tell him what had really happened, but now they were arguing and the argument was spiraling out of control.

"I'm leaving," Sakura said.

"Sakura…" Syaoran took a step in her direction.

"I'm a grownup, believe it or not, so leave me alone."

"You're being irrational, Sakura, I…"

Syaoran was left gaping when she turned and walked swiftly through the lobby without letting him finish his sentence. She was steaming mad, Syaoran realized, and he rushed to follow her, calling her name. He knew it was too late when she jumped into the first cab there, leaving the concierge and the next person in line speechless.

Sakura gave Yue's address to the cab driver, and once there, she settled to wait outside his door. She didn't know why she was so angry—at Syaoran. As she calmed down, she realized he was just trying to help…but still, she was furious at him for interfering…and for exposing that he knew her shame.

She had a long time to think—because Yue didn't come home until after midnight. He did a double take upon seeing her outside his apartment.

"Sakura?" Yue looked at her curiously. "Why are you here, baby?"

"I'm waiting for you, because I don't have a key to your place," she said pointedly.

"What is it?" He ignored her comment, unlocked the door, and ushered her in. Sakura walked in but did not sit down, even though her feet hurt from standing by the door for so long.

"Don't you owe me an apology?" she said, arms crossed.

"For what?" Yue tried to embrace her, but she moved away.

"For humiliating me in front of my family and friends," she said stiffly.

"I told you to put it on my bill…"

"Well, I didn't want my poor family dining out at your expense so I paid for it."

"So what's the problem?" Yue was puzzled. "Come on baby, calm down." He bent to kiss her and she pushed him away.

"Damn it!" Suddenly Sakura was sick and tired of everything. "You told me to arrange for this. You set the time and the place. You…"

"Yes, I know, but there are more important things…"

"Than me?" Sakura sank into a chair. "Yue, you're supposed to be my boyfriend…"

"I am, baby, I am. And I do love you."

"So why did you bail out? I didn't force you into it," Sakura protested.

"I had other things to do. My family comes first. You should understand that!" Yue pleaded.

_Oh God. _There it was—what Syaoran had warned her about. Why hadn't she listened to him?

"You could at least have told me in advance. Common politeness," Sakura seethed. "We were on the phone a few hours before dinner."

"You handled it well, I'm sure…"

"Do you even realize how I feel?" Sakura was ready to scream but she kept her voice even. "How embarrassed I am right now?"

"Look, my parents would never have understood if I told them I had a prior commitment to you," Yue said, rubbing his temples. "Why can't you understand that?"

Her jaw dropped open at the sheer effrontery of his statement. "It's called manners, Yue. Look it up in the dictionary."

A long silence ensued.

"This isn't working out," Yue said quietly.

"What isn't?"

"Us. You don't understand why I have things, commitments to honor…"

"What?" Sakura couldn't believe her ears. "All you have to do is apologize! How hard is that?" Her eyes were brimming with tears.

"You're Japanese," Yue said, as if that answered everything.

"And that means I don't have the right to basic courtesy from my own lover? Yes, and don't you dare flinch, Yue, we are lovers," Sakura said.

"Yes but…Look, I'll be honest. You mean a lot to me, but…Don't we have good times together? I love being with you. I love making love to you…"

"So is that what I am, your mistress? A good time girl?" Sakura was incredulous. "Is that what 'I love you' means to you?"

"You make it sound so bad," Yue protested. "Come on, babe, look at reality. I'm the only heir to a big company, and they expect me to marry someone Chinese, a virgin girl from a good background. You won't pass that criteria, but I don't care because being with you is fun. Why should we worry about tomorrow? Let's enjoy today. Come on," and he nuzzled her neck.

Sakura could not move; she felt as if she had been punched in the gut. Was that all she was to Yue?

"You…You think of me as…as a _**mistress**_?" she whispered disbelievingly.

"The one I love," he said as he nibbled on her ear.

"For now…" Sakura whispered. "What happens when your family decides it's time for you to marry someone?"

"We'll worry about that then. Come on, Sakura, be reasonable," Yue wheedled.

She stood there, letting him kiss and fondle her. Something was roaring in her ears, and she thought she could hear voices taunting her.

Hadn't they just made passionate love a few days ago? Hadn't he been the one—not her—to say he loved her forever? Yue had been so happy; he'd shown her that making love wasn't just about what he wanted, but also about her pleasure. She'd thought they were doing fine. So what was this now?

"What really happened, Yue? Why did they call you home?" Sakura asked quietly.

He stopped touching her. "My parents found about about you and they don't approve," he said, unable to meet her eyes. "I can't marry you," Yue said. "My family would never approve."

"It's too early for that," Sakura said. "I just...Wait! Where did you get the idea I wanted marriage? Yue, I love you but not yet..." She wriggled free of his grasp and stood next to the door, her arms folded.

"I'm at the age where I need to marry," Yue said. "And my parents have made it clear they won't stand for someone who isn't Chinese."

"I am not trying to marry you," Sakura said, keeping her voice level. "I love you but I..."

Yue crossed over and took her in his arms. "I love you too but I can't go against my parents' wishes." He bent his head to kiss her. "But that doesn't mean we can't have something beautiful together. Who says this has to end when I'm married?"

"I didn't ask you to," Sakura pushed Yue away. "And I am not pressuring you to marry me; I didn't even think of it!" Her green eyes were blazing. "You act like I forced you to make a choice when I didn't!"

"By being there you forced me to make a choice," Yue said sadly. "I love you but I can't..."

And to her dismay Sakura knew what the choice was. "Fine." She removed the emerald earrings he'd given her and placed them on a side table in his living room.

"Here. Sorry for the bother. I'm sorry I disrupted your life. I'm sorry I'm such a...nuisance. And I'm sorry but I refuse to be your 'good time girl' because I have too much pride for that shit. And I will never be your goddamned mistress!"

She was somewhat ashamed; she'd never talked to anyone that way before but...she couldn't take it anymore.

"No. You can keep them," Yue began, but Sakura was halfway out the door.

"No. You can't buy me."

"Wait…Is this…Are you…"

"Since you're too much of a coward to say it, I'm breaking it off. Go find your virginal Chinese princess. Goodbye and be happy with your wonderful pureblood family," Sakura said, fighting the tears in her eyes.

He caught her, gathering her into his arms. "At least let me kiss you goodbye," Yue whispered.

It was the hardest thing in the world for Sakura to turn her head and push Yue away. "No." She walked away stiffly, not looking back, not crying, not running.

And he never chased after her; he merely looked at her then closed the door. That told her, with finality, that she would never mean more to him than a 'good time girl' would.

Sakura would never know how she made it home that night. She didn't bother telling anyone what had happened; whatever for? So that she would be pitied again? Or—maybe they would wonder why she'd lost yet another boyfriend.

It had happened so fast; she had had no sign, nothing to tell her something was wrong. She thought of the last few days over and over: had she said something, done anything to suggest she was pressuring him into marriage?

_No. It's you. Something is innately wrong with you,_ a voice sneered in her head. _You are a freak, Sakura. Everyone you love hurts you then leaves you. What makes you think you can be loved?_

She tried to ignore the taunting voice in her head, which sounded like her high school boyfriend Kito's voice. She got no sleep that night; memories of her and Yue kept running through her head, and nothing would make them go away.

But she tried. She turned on the lights in her room and purged it of his presents, his photos, things that reminded her of him. Even her closet—she removed blouses and dresses he liked, the one she'd worn when they first met, on their first date, when they first made love…she almost laughed when she realized how much of her closet was disappearing into the box she'd dumped Yue mementoes into. But the act served its purpose; the first rays of dawn were peeking over the horizon, and she breathed a sigh of relief.

Then Sakura began to pack a large backpack haphazardly; she did not know where she was going, or what she would do, but she just wanted to be alone, somewhere other than there. She did not want to see anyone, or talk to anyone. She couldn't face anyone right now, least of all Tomoyo or Syaoran.

For her father, Sakura left a note saying she would be out of town for an assignment and she would be back in a week. As for work, calling Rika was the easiest way out; she told the calm, gentle woman that she needed a week's leave 'for my health.' As Sakura predicted, Rika did not ask questions but merely said she would do as Sakura asked. Getting a cab to pick her up before her father woke up was easy.

She decided to email Tomoyo from her cell phone at the train station in Tokyo instead of calling her, saying she was on assignment. Email meant Tomoyo would not be able to trace her location. As for Syaoran, Sakura could not face him, and so she did not tell him where she was going. She remembered all the warnings Syaoran had issued about Yue, and he reminded her of her own foolishness in believing Yue, in thinking that everything was going to be all right, that someone really did love her in that romantic way a man loves a woman. Finally, she turned her cell phone off.

Surveying the destination board at the station, she chose Osaka as it had many small inns by the seaside; Sakura had always loved the sea, and so it seemed like a good place to go. Using cash instead of a credit card, Sakura got a ticket, and finally slept the sleep of exhaustion on the train, a dark, dreamless sleep for which she was grateful.

Once at Osaka, she checked into a tiny inn by Osaka Bay, and after more dreamless sleep, she roamed the city aimlessly, hating herself, hating why she seemed to drive all those who claimed to love her away. And drowning in the memories of the first real taste of love she'd had.

_I'm a freak, _Sakura told herself as she sat in one of Osaka's famous rock and sand Zen gardens. _I don't deserve to love, or to be loved. I'm never good enough for anyone, and everything I touch turns to shit._

What Fate had in store for her next was an even more cruel blow, though.

**(To be continued next weekend)**

* * *

**In Chapter 4:** _Syaoran comforts Sakura, who is forced to face a demon from her past, and tragedy hits the Kinomoto family._

(1) Lyrics from "Leaving Yesterday Behind" by Keno. I do not own this song, nor am I claiming it is mine.

**Chapter notes:** _"Onii-chan"- Brother; what Sakura calls Touya_

_The Imperial Hotel and Hei Fung Terrace (which serves Cantonese fusion fare) are real; feel free to Google it! I only got to the lobby when I was there but wow, it's just so luxurious._

_I know Yue seems a bit out of character from the anime and manga, but allow me to say that I've considered this carefully. He can be very sexy and strangely sweet, but he also seems to take things to an extreme, and he carries cruel biases as well, so I think the manipulation of his character here to suit the story is fairly logical. He's not evil per se; Yue is acting according to how his world expects him to be, and I feel his unintentional cruelty is even more painful as a result._

_I am not making up the biases against non-Chinese that Yue has. I base this on members of my own family, and trust me when I tell you they can be very close-minded about this whole issue of blood. One of my relatives has never spoken to a woman my cousin married; she's a beautiful, wonderful person, but just because she's half-Spanish and half-Filipino, my relative thinks she's 'disgusting'. Don't get me wrong; a majority of Filipino Chinese are not like this, but those who are biased can be very, very cruel and irrational._

_I wonder if you notice the difference between Yue (in this story and the earlier chapters of "Slowly, Sweetly") and Syaoran (in "Slowly, Sweetly" ch 15) when they make love to Sakura? One of them truly loves her; the other one loves making love to her. I guess it's obvious which is which, I hope._

_In "Slowly, Sweetly," I made it clear that Yue never knew Syaoran, but Syaoran knew of Yue. I didn't make it clear though that Sakura and Syaoran already knew each other then, hence the correction in this revision._

_Syaoran in both the manga and the anime tends to pick things up slowly but when he comes to a realization, he follows it through. I decided to focus on his thought processes instead of on him and sakura 'roleplaying' his relationship with Alia/Loraina so that I could foreshadow his relationship with Sakura and show how he gets to who he is in ch 15 of "Slowly, Sweetly."_

_Yes, I've removed a lot of Eriol-Tomoyo-Touya scenes from the rewrite. My problem is, now that my co-writer from "The Heart Has Seasons" is inactive in CCS, and is focusing on her work in HP, I have trouble with that story; hence it is, sadly, on hiatus until I can find someone I can discuss it with and write it with ^_^_

_Syaoran and Fujitaka, I think, would be good friends; in the anime, remember the part where Syaoran stands on a chair to applaud Fujitaka and gets pissed when he realizes Fujitaka is Sakura's father? I decided to explore this so that I could add something in the next chapter about Fujitaka, Syaoran, and Sakura: a scene in which Fujitaka comforts his daughter. In the anime, when Sakura breaks down after accidentally destroying Fujitaka's computer, and when she cheers up after she confesses to Yukito and gets rejected gently, I loved how Fujitaka seems to know just how much comfort his daughter needs without being overly intrusive. Sigh, oh for a dad like that!_

_Sakura's angry response to what Yue does is based on the way she gets angry in the anime and manga. She will be sorry for the burst of temper later, but will be very defiant when in the throes of her anger. Though when she does run away at the end of this chapter, again I based it on how she acts in the series. She WILL come back, but I figured as an older person, having gone through what she has, she might need more time to recover before coming back to tackle her problems._


	4. Comfort

**A Shelter for Broken Hearts Chapter 4**

**Comfort**

absolutefluffiness says: _SORRY! this has been ready to post since FRIDAY but I haven't been able to get to a net café until now, and since I'm rushing to get home, I apologize again for not being able to respond to all who reviewed (please see below). I appreciate it, and I hope you forgive the tardiness! The next chapter will take some time as I have a term paper due, but it won't take more than two weeks. Enjoy, and please review!_

**

* * *

~o0o~**

Syaoran was expecting to have a Saturday Cat's Eye Café brunch with Sakura that weekend, and the debacle over Yue's no-show at the Imperial Hotel aside, he was looking forward to mocking Sakura playfully. She had been so upset and angry at the hotel, and he was sure she'd had it out with Yue as a result.

He snickered. Sakura would **toast** Yue's ass, of that he was sure, and Syaoran would have paid good money for ringside seats to that event. And brought popcorn and soda to boot.

But when he called her to confirm, he got only the answering machine.

Calling her cell phone got him routed to voice mail. It was quite unusual; Syaoran went to her house and found she wasn't there either; he peeked through the window of the Kinomoto porch and found nothing. Calling her office, he got connected to Rika Sasaki-Terada, who told him Sakura was on leave.

On leave? Without telling him? It wasn't like Sakura to do that, and she never disappeared on their brunch meetings without telling him first. So where the hell was she?

All Tomoyo could supply him with was that Sakura had called her to say she was on assignment, and that she was all right.

"Is she, really? Daidouji, this is not normal behavior from Sakura, and you know it!" Syaoran said.

"No, it's not, but I truly do not know where she is," was the straightforward reply. "Li-kun, when Sakura retreats this way, it usually means only one thing: she is upset and unhappy. When we were children I usually had to ask before she would talk about things that made her unhappy. As we got older, she retreated when hurt. All I can do is guess at what happened."

"Guess away, then," Syaoran said.

"I think she broke up with Yue."

"Then why didn't she tell me?" Syaoran roared. "It's not like that stupid assed long-haired conceited jerk was worth her time anyway. Who wants a bigot for a boyfriend?"

"She did. She was in love, Li-kun, and she's been hurt so often…" Tomoyo drew a deep breath. "Li-kun, you ask why she said nothing to either of us? I think it's perhaps…because she was ashamed."

"Balls of Satan, why would she be ashamed? That poncy prick should be the one ashamed!" Syaoran said angrily. "You ought to know that his excuse was bullshit. If he cared about her he would have showed up!"

"I'm sure Sakura-chan knows that as well. Perhaps she didn't want you to know that she had lost someone in her life again."

"How can you be so calm, knowing she's God knows where brooding over that dickhead, that she's hurt…Fuck it, Daidouji, don't you care?"

The response was quiet. "That **you** care tells me a lot, and I appreciate it, Li-kun," was what Tomoyo said.

Syaoran spluttered, "W-what?"

"It's nice to know she's begun changing you already, Li-kun." He could almost hear the smile in her voice.

"That's not it…Why are you going off topic? What about Sakura?"

"I have every faith in you," was the quiet response before she hung up.

Syaoran groaned and swore. She and Eriol were getting more alike with each day, and if they ever married he made a mental note to avoid them when they were together. He could only take one cryptic person at a time.

* * *

**~o0o~**

"You could have been held up! Kidnapped! How fucking stupid are you?" Syaoran railed at Sakura when he finally caught her at home as she returned; he'd taken to waiting outside her house for a sign of her. He'd almost pinned her to the wall of her porch with his arms on either side of her.

Syaoran had never been very good at expressing himself; he was very upset that Sakura had run away without telling him or Tomoyo. So when he'd finally seen her, he resorted to the rough language and behavior he used when he wanted to hide how much he cared about something.

She looked up at him with a blank expression. Sakura looked thin and starved; her eyes were dull and haunted, and in a flat voice, she said, "Sorry. I wasn't thinking. I have to go to sleep. Good night, Syaoran-kun, and sorry for the bother."

"Why didn't you tell me? Idiot! It's been months since I started warning you about Yue's assholery; can't you just let it go? It's not like the dickhead is worth it, I mean, why do you still even care?" The irony of him telling her to let go of a dead relationship while he was still, after a year and a half, mourning the loss of Alia/Loraina, was lost on him.

She didn't answer; a single tear rolled out of one eye and she opened the door without saying anything except, "I'm sorry I'm not strong like you."

"What? I never told you to be strong—I said, just forget about Yue! If he really loved you, would he have dropped you on such a fucking stupid excuse? He didn't love you! He just had fun with you and when trouble arrived, he fled like the worthless coward he is!" Syaoran sincerely believed what he was saying, and to his surprise, Sakura went pale.

She stammered before saying, "So even you, who never really met him…you know Yue didn't love me." Her voice was still and tiny; the hurt in it sliced at Syaoran.

He almost struck himself when he realized that with his thoughtless words he'd pushed her even further into her shell of misery. She was about to close the door when he shoved his way into her house, slamming the door behind himself.

"What?" Sakura stumbled, and he caught her, setting her on her feet firmly.

"Fucking hell!" Syaoran yelped when he caught her and discovered how light she was. "Haven't you been eating? Do you need someone to take care of you? Christ, Sakura! What is wrong with you?"

A tear simply rolled down her cheek; to his horror, she sobbed soundlessly, staring off into the distance. It was like everything he said or did made her cry even more. He felt like a bull in a china shop, delicate things crashing around him and he couldn't help it because he was big and clumsy and thoughtless.

Fuck that. He was not an asshole, and he was not going to let Sakura cry alone.

"Sit down," he said roughly, pushing her on the couch. Sakura flopped onto it almost bonelessly, and Syaoran fought the urge to shake her. He lost the battle to stay silent, though.

"God damn it, Sakura! You can't let that fucker get to you! He's not worth it!"

Sakura suddenly stood up and yelled, "Maybe it wasn't him who wasn't worth it but me! You think he didn't love me, right? Then it's obvious that what's wrong was me! I'm not strong and perfect and anything like you, and maybe Yue knew it, knew something's wrong with me…he knew I'm not worth fighting for! Whether or not I'm Chinese, that wouldn't have mattered if he loved me!"

Stunned, Syaoran stared at her for several minutes. How could someone so sweet and funny and gorgeous and so much fun to be around think of herself as not being worth it? What kind of pain could push her into that kind of despair?

Pain like his own, he abruptly realized. No, pain _**worse**_ than his own. Loraina had, if he cared to face it, let him down gently and explained all her reasons and had not taken anything from him. The letters she sent regularly through Eriol showed that she was a kind, decent person for whom leaving him had been as hard for her as it was for him. Yet Sakura had gone through this crap at least three times, with one guy cheating on her and another dumping her for a very stupid reason. Of course she was in pain. He'd just been blind to it all.

He considered his words carefully before saying, "That's not true. It could never be true." He stepped closer to Sakura; she turned her face away from him.

"Look at me, damn it." Syaoran turned Sakura to face him. "I don't care what his excuse was. I know you broke it off 'cause he doesn't have the balls to end something that benefits him. I don't really know what went on between the two of you but I knew you were happy. So I know it was his fault."

"No, it's me, I'm not Chinese, he had to—his parents, he…"

Syaoran bit his lip to keep from yelling; he rasped, "Shut it, Sakura. Stop making excuses for others, all right? Just…stop it." He ran his hands through his hair in frustration; Syaoran always had to do something with his hands when he was frustrated, and it was either shake Sakura or torment his hair. He chose the latter.

Sighing, Sakura said, "Look, Syaoran, I'll be okay. I just need to be alone."

"You shouldn't be alone! You can't handle this!" He bit his tongue before he could add, _you need me, stop pushing me away!_

A weak smile appeared on Sakura's face. "Really, Syaoran, I'll be fine. I…I'm sorry I yelled at you a while ago."

Syaoran clenched his fists and glared at Sakura. How could she be thinking of his feelings at a time like this? He wanted to tell her how stupid and stubborn she was being, but the words never left his mouth.

That was what was so beautiful about her. She was just herself in a world that prided itself on masks and facades. She was not ashamed to show how she felt, to cry when she needed to, to just be so damned thoughtful of others. Syaoran breathed in and out, calming himself, not wanting to say something unkind in his rush to get Sakura to stop being depressed.

"You can't let your happiness depend on a single person," Syaoran said slowly. "Not only is it a burden on that person, one he might not care to support, but…" and he held her hand reassuringly, "you also shut the door on others who care for you. Like Daidouji. Like Eriol. Like me, your brother, your dad…"

He was relieved when she looked at him, stopped crying, then slowly smiled. "Says he who hasn't let go of Alia."

Syaoran's mouth dangled open. Score for Sakura.

"I…That is…You…"

For once she had the upper hand. "I'm waiting for an answer," she teased.

Unable to defend himself from her very accurate observation—one made in the midst of her depression, come to think of it—he instead stood over her and put a hand on top of her head.

"Idiot," he said affectionately, then began to give her a noogie, rubbing the top of her head so that he mussed her hair badly.

"Hey! Stop it!" Sakura yelped.

"Nope." Syaoran grinned at her.

"Syaoran! I'm warning you!" Sakura was flailing, and Syaoran was using his height advantage to stay out of her reach.

"What are you gonna do, kiss me? Ugh, gross." Syaoran made a face.

"Oh yeah? Same to you—kissing you would be like kissing an ashtray!" Oh, score one for her again; Syaoran was still an occasional smoker at that point. But he kept mussing her hair.

"Quit it!" Sakura shrieked. She caught one of Syaoran's legs with a wild kick, and he went down on top of her, overbalancing and landing on the soft carpet.

"Ow." Syaoran had not been hurt, but he said it anyway to rile her.

"You're heavy," Sakura groaned from beneath him.

"Yeah, well, you smell," Syaoran singsonged. She didn't, but the opportunity to annoy was a golden one.

"I DO NOT!" she screeched. Syaoran chuckled. Score one for me.

"Someone needs a ba-ath…" he continued.

"OOH SYAORAN YOU STUPID BAST…" She caught herself before she completed the dirty word, and choked on it.

Syaoran began to laugh. It felt so good to laugh at her and with her, and to know that he was comforting her in the process. She's my best friend, he thought, and it amused him; he'd never had a female friend who was this close. Meiling would not be amused, he knew; she had spent their childhood and adolescence trying to get Syaoran to lighten up. When she had warned him about his marriage to Alia, he had simply cut her off. Yet here he was doing exactly what Meiling wanted—with a woman, no less.

Sakura glared at him for a second, then when she caught sight of the mirthful expression on Syaoran's face, fought her own giggles.

"Come on, you know you want to laugh…come on…HA!" Syaoran, catching Sakura unaware, began to poke and tickle at her sides.

She finally laughed, but the laugh was mixed with a few sobs. He waited until she calmed down, leaning against him for support. Though Syaoran was still not fully over Alia at that point, he understood that Sakura needed comfort, and he held her gently, patting her back as she choked and cried.

"Do you know what's p-pathetic?" Sakura finally said after a long period of silence. Syaoran did not reply, but waited for her to continue; he knew she would say more. "I…Yue and I never…never laughed this way, the way we do. I could never cry on him the way I do with you. And we never joked around the way we do. I thought we would have time for that later."

She sniffed. "I assumed we had a-all the time in the world. Third time lucky, you know what they say. Apparently not for me." Her voice became bitter. "Look at me. World's greatest failure with relationships. Applaud me for making stupid assumptions and for thinking people actually loved me." Her voice trailed off into a forced laugh.

"That's pointless," Syaoran scolded her gently. "Don't be silly. You take things too hard."

"I just…" Then she was crying again. "I should be crying in Yue's arms, not yours. I should be able to tell him all the things I tell you without him telling me to just buck up or be strong or not to cry or be a sissy. You're my guy friend, you know? You…you should be Yue…Someone who loves me should be holding me in his arms like you, comforting me like you do…I can't…I wish…I wish someone loved me enough to do that!" Scrunching up her face into an expression of misery, Sakura pressed her face against Syaoran's chest and began to cry so hard, her breath was drawn in high-pitched whines.

Syaoran held her, unoffended by what she had said because he understood—because he too was beginning to wish that Alia was in his arms, that he had had with her the same easy friendship he had with Sakura. He understood because he too felt like a failure in love, like he could only be comfortable with a woman he did not (at least then) consider someone he could fall in love with.

After a while, Sakura fell asleep in his arms; he'd carried her to her bed and tucked her in. It was past midnight, and with a jolt he realized her birthday had passed.

"Happy birthday, Sakura. I just wish it didn't have to be this way," he whispered as he kissed her cheek. He went down and stayed the night on her couch, wondering why he hadn't fallen for someone like Sakura instead. If only he had understood things better then, perhaps everything might have been easier for both of them.

Little did he know that Yong Song Li had seen the confrontation between Syaoran and Sakura, and heard the rest of it when they had moved inside her house thanks to the surveillance he'd placed on his only son.

_She makes him feel,_ he smiled. _And she makes him care about her._

Yong Song had also observed Syaoran with Loraina when he'd began coming to Tokyo for his treatments. That relationship had been passionate but somewhat one-sided; right before the marriage ended, he had known it was coming; he alone had seen poor Loraina crying in misery from her inability to make Syaoran understand her. He'd seen with sorrow how the relationship devolved, and when the divorce papers were filed, he had been greatly saddened when Syaoran had retreated into himself, saying nothing to anyone, not even to Eriol. That was why he'd felt justified when he'd spied on Syaoran with Sakura.

Sakura. The young woman was sweet and gentle, and Yong Song believed she would make a wonderful wife for Syaoran. And they were starting out as friends. He'd always believed that would make a good foundation for any relationship. Perhaps playing Cupid this time would be fun—and could take his mind off his terrible cancer treatments.

And if it meant his son would have a chance at real love—the one he'd never had—then maybe things would be worth it.

* * *

**~o0o~**

Fujitaka Kinomoto came home to find Syaoran Li sleeping on their couch, and he smiled. He had known why Sakura had fled, and while it pained him to let his daughter go, he decided he would deal with it when she returned. He had known it would end badly the moment Yue had given a lame excuse for not showing up, and when Sakura had left without facing him, his worst fears were confirmed.

Syaoran stirred, and Fujitaka smiled. The younger man cared for Sakura, and Sakura liked him a lot. They were friends, but Fujitaka was surprised when Touya, normally reticient on the subject of Sakura's romances, had suddenly blurted out on the way home that he wished it was Syaoran Sakura was dating instead of Yue.

"_And why is that?" Fujitaka asked gently._

"_Even if he takes something precious away from us, he knows her value. I hate him, I hate everyone who has the power to hurt my little kaijuu, Dad, but…" Touya sighed. _

"_But Li-kun seems a little better than the rest" Fujitaka prodded, smiling._

_Touya eyed his father. "You knew all along, didn't you?"_

"_Sakura-san tried too hard to seem happy throughout the meal. I would not impose my beliefs on her, especially since she was already hurt. Just as I don't impose on you, even though at times you seem to need a little help with the situation you find yourself in with Tsukishiro-kun and Tomoyo-san."_

_Touya put a hand on his father's shoulder. "I'm sorry…I didn't know you knew."_

"_It's a special power of fathers," Fujitaka joked lightly. "But if I may? Always be happy with your decisions. That's all."_

Fujitaka climbed the stairs to Sakura's room, and knocked gently.

"Otou-san?" Sakura called.

"May I come in?"

"Yes."

Fujitaka came in and saw a drawn-looking Sakura sitting up in bed looking out the window. She turned to him, and without a word, he sat by her side and hugged her.

"Always remember, Sakura-san," he said gently, "that we love you, no matter what."

Sakura began to cry, and Fujitaka held her as she sobbed. She needed to let it out; he would have argued that his daughter needed to cry to cope with things, and would have been very annoyed at anyone who would stop her from crying when she needed it. The trick was to know when to stop her, and when he knew it was time to do so, he crooned, "That's enough, my dear daughter."

Holding her away from him, Fujitaka smiled. "Feel better?"

A tiny smile. "I think so, otou-san."

"Things always seem worse than they really are at first, but think of it this way: At least you found out what Yue-san was like before you were in too deep. And now you're free to find new love." Fujitaka's eyes twinkled; he had a candidate, but he would not tell Sakura that; it might spoil the development of her relationship with Syaoran.

"You always know what to say to make me feel better," Sakura said gratefully.

"That's a dad's power," he chuckled. "And Sakura-san?"

"Yes, otou-san?"

"Happy birthday. I know it was yesterday, and I can only wish Yue had timed his breakup with you earlier."

Sakura smiled. "He didn't. I broke things up."

Fujitaka smiled again. "That's my brave little girl. Now go and wake Li-kun; he must be sore from sleeping on the couch."

"Hoe! He stayed?" Sakura frantically stood up. "Why didn't he tell me?"

"I'm sure he just wanted to be sure you were all right." Fujitaka stood up as well. "I'll go unpack my things from the conference, and if it's all right with you, can we have pancakes?"

"Okay!" Sakura smiled, then hugged her father. "I love you, otou-san."

"And I love you," Fujitaka said. "My best reward will be when you smile the Sakura smile again."

Sakura nodded, feeling like a happy child, and as soon as she struggled into a shirt and shorts, she ran downstairs.

Syaoran raised his head when Sakura dashed into the living room; all he heard was, "Pancakes! I know you like Western breakfasts so stay there and wait!"

As Syaoran, Fujitaka, and Sakura sat down to breakfast, Fujitaka watched his daughter and her friend, smiling when he realized that Syaoran probably had few friends and cherished Sakura a lot. They laughed, teased each other, and had an easy familiarity with each other that Fujitaka liked seeing.

_Perhaps in time_, he mused. Yes, that would be a wonderful possibility.

Syaoran drove home to bathe, and then later, he took Sakura out for lunch as 'payment' for the breakfast—and a belated birthday celebration. Tomoyo called, giving Sakura an earful about going missing without telling her, and Sakura had to promise she would allow her best friend to take her shopping for a 'post-breakup-pizzazz wardrobe.' Plus the details of what happened.

"You have to love that woman," Syaoran chuckled.

"I do," Sakura said gratefully. "And you too, for being one of my best friends."

"Nah, you love me because I'm the best," he bragged playfully.

"Well, if you say so." And she slapped his arm lightly.

They went to the Cat's Eye café, bickering about who owed whom what.

"Look, I surrender, you bossy woman," Syaoran said after a long accounting of who had paid for which meal in the past few months.

"Good," Sakura crossed her arms smugly. "It's my birthday and I'll buy you what I want to."

"How do you feel?" Syaoran asked.

Sakura sobered. "I don't know."

_Oh crap I just had to bring it up_, Syaoran thought. "Sakura, I…"

"It's okay…" "No, I didn't…"

Syaoran sat back. "You go first. Sorry about that."

Sakura's eyes widened. "Did you just say the word sorry?"

"Uh," and Syaoran looked guilty, "I don't know."

"Hooray! It's a special day!" Sakura cheered. But Syaoran knew she was trying to avoid the topic and pretend she was all right.

Syaoran looked at her and moved closer. "You don't have to force your cheer on my behalf," he said softly. "I-you need time to deal with the Yue shit. So, just be you. Okay?" And he bent her head to lean on his shoulder, holding her hand reassuringly.

She sighed. "You know me that well? I must be more mysterious then."

"And quit the jokes." Syaoran said gently.

"They make me feel better."

"All right, but you were never really the jokey type," Syaoran grumbled.

The Cat's Eye Café owner Fay suddenly materialized in front of them, and Syaoran almost jumped. He held out a large mug of hot chocolate with marshmallows, whipped cream, and sprinkles to Sakura.

"This is my antidote to tales of woe," he said as he set it down in front of Sakura and smiled. "No matter how bad it is, if you share it with a friend, things get better." He bowed, and left a small note on the table reading, "This lunch is on the house. Happy birthday, Sakura-chan!"

"Hoe!" Sakura turned a glare on Syaoran. "Why did you tell him?"

"I didn't!" Syaoran said indignantly. "And we weren't planning to go here today, so how could I have told him?"

Sakura frantically motioned a smiling waitress, who said, "The owner has left instructions not to accept any payment from you or from him." She indicated Syaoran with her eyes.

"All right then. We'll be back for more meals instead," Syaoran said cheerfully.

"Your business is always welcome, Li-san," she said.

Sakura, Syaoran noticed, was smiling a little more ever since the unexpected birthday greeting. _She likes surprises,_ he thought, and filed the little idea away for future reference.

* * *

**~o0o~**

Sakura and Syaoran spent the next few days together; he took her to work sometimes, and when she was late, he would pick her up, grumbling at her insistence on using public transportation. As usual she forced "payment" on him, in this case, a weekend lunch.

When they discovered Touya was home to get some papers from their files in the basement, Syaoran was uneasy; Touya had never really taken to him and a negative chemistry crackled between brother and best friend, something that amused Sakura. Though they had gotten along well at the Imperial Hotel, Syaoran still felt uneasy around the gruff older man.

But on this late April afternoon, as Sakura washed the dishes, Touya had given him a gruff once-over.

"You two still aren't dating?" he asked. "I thought otou-san said the long-haired wuss Yue was out of the picture."

"Huh? No..." Why would Touya even think that, Syaoran wondered. It would be like dating a sister, for heaven's sake.

Touya raised an eyebrow. "Are you gay?"

_Like you? _Syaoran wanted to retort, but he bit his tongue, remembering the smoldering chemistry between Touya and Tomoyo, so he instead clenched his fists and teeth before grinding out, "NO."

"My sister is beautiful. What's wrong with you? Why do you hang around her if you don't want her?" Touya pressed.

"What?" Syaoran was surprised by the question, looking at Touya as though the latter were stupid. "Who wouldn't want to be her friend?" was what he blurted out, as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

The older brother looked at him gravely, then said, to Syaoran's surprise, "You'll do."

"What?" Touya's behavior was puzzling Syaoran, and he was getting a strange feeling, one that made him uneasy.

"You take care of Sakura." A ghost of a smile was on Touya's lips. "Better you than the long-haired Chinese snobface…"

"Hey, I'm Chinese too," Syaoran retorted.

"Just a brat, not a snotty snobface," Touya said. "Like I said, better you, Chinese brat, than that Chinese snot or that cheating pretty boy. If you ever make Sakura cry, I'll get you. Even if I'm dead, I'll come back from the grave and haunt you."

_Is he actually joking with me? _Syaoran wondered, his jaw open. His natural antagonism moved him to say, "You'd have to die first." He delighted in pointing out the obvious.

"Cheeky sod." Yet Touya's expression was indecipherable; neither hostile nor angry, he was just looking at Syaoran in a way Syaoran couldn't read.

Syaoran huffed; what was with the strange British expression? His bangs flew upwards. "We're not dating. We don't think of each other that way," he bristled.

Touya had merely looked at him thoughtfully, and when Sakura reappeared at that point, he ruffled her hair, making her screech in annoyance, and said, "You go on with your brat boyfriend to wherever your afternoon date is."

"Syaoran is NOT my boyfriend! You're mean, onii-chan!" Sakura yelled after him. "Honestly!"

"Maybe I should take lessons from him on how to piss you off," Syaoran said roguishly, a crooked smile on his lips.

"Yes, well, he doesn't like you so good luck," Sakura had said. She took his hand and said, "Well, so are we going to go look for your new house?"

"Got my eye on three," Syaoran held up a list of addresses. "Two are formerly lived in, and one is brand new. The first used to belong to a big family that migrated to Taiwan, the second was owned by one of Eriol's celebrity friends. The last one, well, let's save that for last because I want your opinion on it. All three offer deep discounts for a cash purchase."

"Well, then let's start with your first," Sakura smiled. "And how are you paying for this?"

"I sold my old house with Loraina, and I've got a bit saved up from my work with Eriol and from the commercial jingle work," Syaoran said cheerfully. "The turnover is in May. I'll stay with Eriol and put my stuff in storage until the new place is ready. What say you help me decorate it?"

"Me and Tomoyo-chan!" Sakura said gleefully. "She's the best."

_I knew it would come down to that,_ Syaoran thought, and he sighed; it meant Eriol would also be involved. "Okay then. Let's go!"

The first house, they discovered, tended to be drafty; the second was so large and ornate, Sakura joked that Syaoran could run a bordello on half of the first floor. But the last one had a lovely high slender white metal fence running around the property. It was designed Western-style, with a driveway, a parking garage for two vehicles, and several peach and sakura trees in the yard. Once inside, they found that it seemed to have been designed with Syaoran in mind: on the ground floor, a large drawing room sat next to an empty hall which he could use for a studio. The last room was a kitchen, and a toilet and bath was next to a ground floor guest room. On the second floor were four bedrooms; Syaoran intended to use one as a library or study, and he playfully kidded Sakura that she was welcome to have one permanent room there.

"Hah. I might take you up on that," she kidded back. "But otou-san needs someone at home with him."

"Oh, that's fine," Syaoran said. "You only need to be here once a week, when you clean up for me."

"SYAORAN!" She slapped his arm, and it quickly degenerated into a tickling and wrestling match, with both participants leaving a flummoxed real estate agent asking, "Pardon, but are you married?"

"Over my dead body," Sakura grumbled as she struggled to her feet. "Why would I marry this pervert?"

"For the money," Syaoran saucily retorted.

"You…" Sakura tried to stomp on his foot, but missed.

"Er…" the agent said, "does this mean Li-san does not like the house?"

Sakura and Syaoran looked at her.

"Of course I am!"

"He definitely is!"

The agent sighed, then said, "Well, then I shall prepare the deed of sale for Li-san this Monday." She carefully edged away from the seemingly lunatic couple, and left a cloud of dust behind her as she fled.

"And now," Syaoran grinned, "we have something else to celebrate! My new home!"

Sakura smiled. "Happy?"

"Well," and Syaoran sat on one of the stairs, "I dunno. It's a new start."

"So can I now set you up with one of my friends?"

"Don't push your luck," Syaoran growled. "Just because your love life blew up in your face doesn't mean you can set me up badly so you can feel better."

Unoffended, Sakura grinned. "I have a lot of pretty friends."

"Oh shut up and let's go get some snacks. Then we can talk to Daidouji and Eriol about getting this place decorated. Okay?"

Sakura giggled. "Okay then." Hand in hand, they left and wandered down the main street of the district to find a place to eat.

To those who saw them, they seemed like a happily married couple—and neither of them knew how soon it would be that they would actually be married.

* * *

**~o0o~**

When Eriol met with Yong Song Li, he was shocked at the older man's appearance. He seemed to have aged a decade in the month since Eriol had last seen him, but despite that, he was smiling.

"I don't have long to live, Eriol," he said quietly as they spoke in Eriol's Tokyo penthouse in the rich district of Ginza.

"You oughtn't speak that way," Eriol said, worry lines showing on his forehead. "And should you not be speaking to Syaoran instead of me?"

Yong Song cleared his throat. "I want my son to marry Sakura. They went househunting the other day, and I believe she will be the best bride for him."

"I still think you ought to talk to Syaoran. Meddling in his personal life is a guaranteed way to infuriate him."

"And you're snow-white in purity when it comes to this meddling?" Yong Song's eyes twinkled.

"Yes, well, but uncle, I've known him since we were children."

"And he is my son." Yong Song settled back in his seat. "I was distant as he grew up, and I made no efforts to truly know him, my daughters, and my wife. I'm afraid Yelan and I were quite aloof with each other, and I hope her bitterness does not become Syaoran's."

"Then why don't you make up with Aunt Yelan-san?" Eriol pointed out the obvious.

"It's very hard when you've spent thirty years being silent antagonists to each other. I can't undo the past, but perhaps I can help Syaoran's future. His sisters have all made love matches, and since his mother is making noises about a bride catalog, I intend to stave that off by forcing Syaoran to see what life could be like with lovely Sakura Kinomoto. How wonderful that her boyfriend's timing for their breakup fits into my plans," he smiled.

Eriol sighed; he could see where Syaoran's stubbornness and refusal to listen to ideas other than his own came from. But then, Yong Song had a point. And if things worked out, then maybe the relationship between Sakura and Syaoran could deepen.

"All right then, uncle. I will help you."

"Wonderful. Now your first task, Eriol-kun, is to find me a lawyer here, who specializes in international law. I'm too well-known in Hong Kong for my will to remain a secret until the time comes. Syaoran must not know, do you hear?"

"Are you not afraid that he or Sakura will date others in the meantime?"

Yong Song mused, "She's still heartbroken, and he—Syaoran has never given his affections easily. Just a little more time."

"You have all the bases covered."

"Well, if you believe that," and Yong Song grinned, "then I will die right before Syaoran's next birthday."

Eriol never doubted for a second that Yong Song would will himself to do so.

But to their shock, it was the Kinomotos and Yukito Tsukishiro who died first.

* * *

**~o0o~**

**In Chapter 4: **Syaoran helps Sakura through two of the worst moments of her life, and she is forced to face another demon from her past.

**EDIT to add notes:**

Fujitaka's use of "-san" with Sakura is in canon; in the original anime, dubbed version (NOT the Cardcaptors Nelvana dub, which was awful), he ALWAYS addresses her as such. In the manga, in the Master of the Clow arc, Sakura is musing on the similarities between Eriol and her dad, and one of these is how he calls her Sakura-san (Samples: Volume 7, last page for Eriol; Volume 1 page 23 for Fujitaka). It is a mark of respect, not degradation in this case, and once I find the link to an essay that discusses why Eriol and Fujitaka both address her with this honorific, I'll post it.

Sakura doesn't like to fight much, and I was afraid her scene with Yue in the last chapter was a bit too much. But then in the second season, when she captures Snow, Kero notes, "Girls sure are scary when they are mad." Since CLAMP personally oversaw every single episode of CCS then we can take them for canon reference.

Sakura hiding when unhappy: She cries to cope, and Syaoran and Fujitaka are the only ones in the series to realize that she needs to cry to get things out of her system (which is very sweet, ne?) When she is upset when Syaoran first appears, she reluctantly talks to Tomoyo and in the series she does tend to withdraw when unhappy. I figured the tendency would be amplified after what she's been through.

Syaoran can be very affectionate when he and Sakura are alone; I felt that he can be the touchy feely type, based on how he acts in the manga and the anime. The elevator episode, which I adore, has him spontaneously hugging her after he thinks he's lost her. Syaoran tends to do things before thinking of the consequences, and so I put that in here. He also likes to yell "Kuso!" which can be both innocuous and dirty, so given his rough character I decided he would tend to have a potty mouth when older. Syaoran doesn't care much for anyone's opinion of him unless it's that of someone he cares for.

And while we're on that, Syaoran is not unnaturally dense. See how long he held on, not confessing to Sakura in both the manga and anime out of respect for her feelings? Also it took him forever to figure them out. Given he's still reeling from the whole Alia/Loraina business, it will take time for him to realize that he's started on loving Sakura already. And as per canon, Sakura won't realize her feelings until later :D

In canon Syaoran's dad passed away when he was little. Also I've come to realize that maybe my handling of Yelan in Slowly Sweetly was wrong, as I've watched the first movie again. I know I took the opposite spectrum of her feelings but...anyway here I decided Syaoran's dad might want to try and give his son some happiness as his legacy.

I chose not to make Touya overly protective and having a "sister complex" as he does in the manga and anime (Yukito twits him about this a lot haha) because I thought he might let go once he knows she's older, but then his protectiveness also allows him to see what can be good for her. In the anime and manga he and Syaoran got off to a bad start since, hell, he DID catch Syaoran attacking his sister! So I tried to envision what it would be like had they gotten off to a less awful start ^_^

Thank you and apologies for the quick responses instead of PMs: _sootyxsnowpetal_- thank you and yes, I feel better thanks to support from nice people like you! I am enjoying writing about the buildup to the wedding, and may cut out Yelan from this version. _DineyBlue-_ I got the ideas for both from you (hugs) when you mentioned that before. Thank you! _pyscho-pyro-shrink-_ thanks! _DN Angel and Cardcaptor Sakura_- Since Syaoran himself doesn't know it yet, it will still be Some time ^_^ _Yingfa Dreamer_- Oh thank you and yes, I loved writing that scene! _AngelEmCuti_- thanks! _broken emerald_- Funny how this rewrite is actually the slower version, haha! _smile4meeh_- I try to keep them in character, and since a friend provided me with the manga scanlations, I hope I'll have an even better grip on them soon! _silver silhouette 08_- I would love to but how about if you ask one of your reviewers for now since I have my hands full with school and work? A beta who can work closely with you would be a wonderful thing! _Enigma infinite_- Thanks! _puasloma_- Thanks! _cupid17-_oh yes, hindsight is 20-20! _bangag pa_- well since it wasn't plagiarism anymore since she apologized and took it down, ok na! I know what you mean and am not offended. yes, PinoyChi me, and I just see so many cases like Sakura went through so I used what I know here. Admittedly they're a lot less like this in HK where some family members live, but I decided to take Yelan Li's character to the opposite extreme of who she was in the first movie--which might have been a mistake (cries). _uvr-b!u5H'd-_ Thanks too! _More Than Useless_- Now you know who's behind the marriage of convenience! Yes, and congratulations for seeing Yue's hypocrisy! You're right there. And yes, Sakura wanted to hide for a while. Funny thing is, she WILL run into an ex soon--but under worse circumstances (hint hint). Thanks! _Julia and Tania-_ I can never thank you enough for the wealth of advice contained in your wonderful beta work for me, which as you can see is continued in this story. Ooh, yes, I decided to use lyrics (in paragraph form, so as not to distract the reader) to mirror what Syaoran thinks and feels. Thank you! _XxButterflyxAngelxLover_ You and me both, although in truth I know people like Yue who honestly cannot see how they hurt people with their biases. _Seirin_- Oh thank you! Please keep reading! _SilentCynara-_ I read your work before! Thank you for the review, and maybe someday we can work together? Just hoping! _xSapphirexRosesxFanx_ Sorry this was a bit late, but as you will see later, Yue really thinks he did not do anything wrong--which makes it worse haha.


	5. Deaths in Spring

**May 2008: Deaths in Spring**

Again I apologize for the delay due to many issues, so I won't make any promises as to the update except to say I will try to put it up as soon as I can. There is a lot of new material in this chapter, and so I would like to invite you to please read and review; suggestions and criticism are very welcome because while I have a beta for Slowly Sweetly I don't have one for this story. Thank you for being so patient!

And I wonder if you want me to follow the original story or if I can change the ending for this one? Do let me know, please, thanks!

**~o0o~**

May came into Sakura and Syaoran's lives like a welcome relief; April had lived up to what a poet had once said about it being the 'cruelest month' of all, and it was with relief that the two had caught the last cherry blossoms on Sapporo.

Syaoran had insisted on renting a boat, and when he had, to Sakura's surprise, managed to row it close to the cherry blossom trees lining the riverbank, had gloated, "You thought I didn't know how."

"Well, yes," Sakura grinned. "Seeing as you're inept with everything else."

"Hey!" Syaoran assumed an exaggerated hurt expression. "Is that any way to treat a guy who's been selfless and kind, who's propped you up past the worst times of your life and sacrificed…uh, sacrificed…"

"…his time and dirty jokes to be with me," Sakura inserted playfully.

"Yeah, whatever, now do your sakura blossom viewing," Syaoran pretended to grouse.

Sakura stretched out a hand and caught a little pink blossom. "For you," she smiled.

Syaoran took the flower, turning it over in his hand. He didn't tell Sakura that the reason why he knew how to row the boat was because he had learned it from Loraina, and that they had made love once, in another place in Japan, on a boat as the cherry blossoms fell around them. He'd thought it was one of the most beautiful things in his life. He still did. He missed his ex-wife, and he was grateful that Sakura was such a good friend. Helping her through the mess with Yue had helped him as well by giving him time and space in which he didn't obsess about the loss of Loraina.

A happy laugh cut through his thoughts; the boat rocked slightly as Sakura stood up and threw her arms up in the air. A breeze rustled past, showering them with the blossoms, and she looked so happy, so beautiful that Syaoran had to smile.

"Look, look, Syaoran!" She twirled lightly, not losing her balance despite the mild rocking of the boat. "I can almost believe that I'm in ancient Japan, like I hadn't a care in the world." She sat back down, and took Syaoran's hands in hers.

"I believe there is always a rainbow after storms," she said. Syaoran noted how flushed her cheeks were, how giddy she looked. "I believe that things will be all right. And I believe that we will be all right."

"Doesn't excuse that asshole Yue," Syaoran fought a grin that was tugging the corners of his mouth upwards. "Just because sakura blossom viewing is making you all hanyaan doesn't mean you should forgive the poncy bastard Yue for what he did to you."

"Always, so serious," Sakura chided him. Then she drew a camera from her pocket and snapped Syaoran's surprised look, the flowers, the other boats floating past.

"Have you turned into Daidouji?" Syaoran demanded.

"No, no, but she made me promise to take photos. Here," and she gingerly sat beside Syaoran.

"W-watch it!" Syaoran did not move, scared the boat would tip over; the inn they had lodgings in was quite a ways off if they walked and it was still a bit nippy; Syaoran disliked cold very much.

"Don't worry. Smile," Sakura pressed her cheek to Syaoran's neck—she couldn't reach his own cheek without stretching—and extended the hand holding the camera. A click announced that Syaoran's uncertain smile and Sakura's happy grin had been immortalized forever, and when Sakura brought the camera back, he saw himself, an uncertain smile on his face, beside a happy Sakura. He had to smile.

Going back to her side of the rowboat, Sakura pressed the 'review' button and laughed. "Could you look any more scared?" she teased Syaoran as she showed him the photo; he had a forced smile on, and she had her eyes squeezed shut. "Don't know how to swim, ne?"

"Please," Syaoran said in a mock condescending, hoity-toity tone. "Excuse me but I was worried a certain crazy woman would tip the boat over. My jacket's a Burberry, my jeans are Guess, and my shirt is Harajuku Hardware, you know."

Sakura snorted. "Rich boy."

"Silly girl," Syaoran retorted.

Sakura was about to slap his arm when the boat rocked. She drew her hand back and gasped; as the boat settled, she giggled.

"See what you made me do?"

Syaoran risked a gamble. "What, proved that you are silly?" he twitted her.

"Oh, just you wait until we get back to the inn!" Sakura fumed.

"And what, you'll short-sheet my futon? As if you can." Syaoran grinned.

"Row us back to shore this instant!" Sakura pretended to boss Syaoran around. "And then we choose weapons on land!"

"Bare hands. One arm tied behind my back," Syaoran needled her.

"You…You…" Sakura tried to find words insulting enough to penetrate what she considered Syaoran's thick hide, as he rowed calmly back to shore.

"Don't worry, Sakura, you have all day to find a word to insult me," he drawled.

"Argh!" Sakura turned her back on him. "It's like you're another Touya sent down—no, up from hell to torment me!"

"He wishes," Syaoran grinned as the attendant handed him the docking rope. "Come on, cherry pig, let's go."

"WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?" Sakura slapped Syaoran's arm hard, earning an "Ouch!" from him.

An older couple waiting to use the rowboat looked at each other and smiled.

"You two are utterly cute," the lady, who looked like she was in her early fifties, smiled.

"That's it," the older man coaxed Sakura. "Train your young husband well, so he'll always obey you."

"No, I mean, we…" Sakura blushed. Syaoran gave her an evil grin and put an arm over her shoulders.

"My wife is ashamed because it was she who begged me to marry her," he said with an earnest face. "But I love her nonetheless."

Sakura's jaw dropped open at Syaoran's sheer effrontery. He was definitely winning the battle of wits now.

"Oh, don't worry," the older woman smiled at Sakura, mistaking her outraged expression for shame. "I'm sure he loves you too." She and her husband bowed, then took their places in the rowboat.

Syaoran waved cheekily at them then, "OW!" Sakura had kicked his shin, hard.

"What did you do that for?" she asked furiously.

"Hey. Two losers in the romance department, that's us," he said as he bent down to rub his shin. "Might as well, yes?"

His twinkling eyes made Sakura join in the game. "Only loser I see is you," she sassed back.

He knelt just as a large crowd of Korean tourists passed them. "Please, don't divorce me," he announced in a loud voice. The girls in the group turned, giggling at the sight of a handsome young man clinging to Sakura's knees in what looked like desperation. "I would die without you!"

Sakura, outraged, looked into Syaoran's eyes; he was choking down mirth, which was quite uncharacteristic of him. She was about to kick Syaoran when he turned his amused eyes on her again. She sighed, sat down on the cold ground, and began to laugh. Syaoran in turn began to laugh as well.

"See? Being 'married' to me isn't such a bad thing," Syaoran grinned.

"You would have to pay me," Sakura sniffed.

"Ten yen a day," Syaoran offered a pittance.

"A hundred thousand," Sakura countered, "for putting up with your mood swings and weirdness. Luckily I know I'm not in danger of having to marry you," she smirked, "so no problem there."

Syaoran rolled his eyes. "Come on, I'm hungry," he said as he trudged towards the inn. "Keep up if you can, cherry pig."

"WHAT?"

He laughed then began to run as Sakura chased him. He could almost pretend that all was right in the world, here in the hinterlands where no one knew them both.

**~o0o~**

When they returned to the city, Syaoran learned of a trip Sakura's father was raising funds for, and decided to drop in on the older man's office at Tokyo University. Fujitaka had invited Syaoran over to give him papers, maps, and photos for the next dig scheduled in the hinterlands of the Philippines. Syaoran was quite interested, and had it not been for some recording obligations with Eriol—and the fact that Touya was coming on the trip—Syaoran would never have bothered inquiring about the trip.

Fujitaka explained that archaeology in the Philippines was a mess compounded by intrigue, politics, and corruption. "But that country has a history which may stretch longer than ours," he explained. "I would like to get the brightest minds there together so that we can figure out what happened in the era when a land bridge connected it to Malaysia and perhaps even to us."

"Wish I could go," Syaoran said wistfully.

"Life sometimes gets in the way, Li-kun, but we work around it." Fujitaka smiled as Syaoran perused some academic papers on the subject. He noticed that Syaoran was fidgeting with his left ring finger, which betrayed signs he'd worn a wedding ring on it until recently. Sakura had given Fujitaka a rundown on Syaoran's sad marriage and the older man placed a hand on the younger man's shoulder.

"Give it time, Li-kun," he had smiled gently.

"Give what time?" Syaoran asked, confused.

"I believe that love always finds a way, and the best kind of love tends to creep up on us when we least expect it."

Syaoran looked away. "I—you know I'm not really over my ex-wife yet, sir."

"Still hurts?" Fujitaka asked sympathetically.

Looking out the window, Syaoran sighed. "She…she was the one who left me…and…" He clenched a fist. "I think I drove her away."

He felt am embarrassed redness on his cheeks; why was he confiding in Fujitaka so easily?

"But," and Syaoran bravely turned and forced on a smile, "Sakura has been my friend. She…she helped me see things. Maybe…Sir, may I ask you something?"

"Of course, Li-kun."

"How long…how long did it take for the pain…to go away…when your wife died?"

"It never really does," Fujitaka's smile faded a bit. "You learn to live with it, to cherish the memories you made together."

"I'm sorry," Syaoran said regretfully. "That was rude of me. She—Loraina, that is, didn't die. Your wife did."

"Don't worry about it," Fujitaka smiled kindly.

Syaoran sighed. "Maybe someday I can forget. Maybe…" He turned to Fujitaka again. "Do you believe in second chances? I feel like maybe someone else might be waiting for me. Does that make sense to you, sir?"

"It does, and I know." Fujitaka's eyes twinkled. "But time truly is our friend if we choose to make it so."

That brought a small smile to Syaoran's lips. He hadn't been close to his father, whom he had nonetheless adored. But Fujitaka—he could see why Sakura was the way she was, delightful and kind and wonderful and strong. It was her father's influence on her.

"You raised a wonderful daughter, Fujitaka-san," Syaoran ventured. "Her friendship means a lot to me."

The older man paused, then smiled. "It makes me happy to hear that, Li-kun. I hope you find her…and remember, sometimes what we need and want the most can have been there all along."

Fujitaka stood up; Syaoran knew the older man was busy, and so he bowed himself out, musing on the advice he'd been given.

He would have much time to think it over in the days to come.

**~o0o~**

"Don't burn the house down while we're gone, monster!"

"Geez! That joke is so old, it has wrinkles," Sakura complained.

"But it still pisses you off," Touya grinned. "Have the Chinese brat come over and make you a meal. Better yet make the rich brat buy you one."

"Will you just knock it off! Oooh, I could just…"

"What, stomp on me? Too bad you never outgrew me."

"ONII-CHAN!"

"Touya-kun," Fujitaka chided gently, "come on. Shall we?"

Touya grinned and hauled his luggage to the small car the Kinomotos owned. He and Yukito were joining Fujitaka for a trip to the Philippines, and had agreed to meet up at the Kinomoto household with him.

Sakura reached up and hugged and kissed her father on the cheek. "Now don't you overwork yourself, otou-san," she chided gently.

"I promise, Sakura-san." He kissed her forehead.

Yukito smiled at Sakura. "You take care, okay?"

"I will." She hugged him; she still loved him very much but as a brother, now. He returned her hug.

To her surprise Touya grabbed her and hugged her roughly as well.

"Hoe?"

"I'll miss the monster," he said as he kissed the top of her head.

Sakura wrinkled her brow, unaccustomed to this strange display of affection from her brother. "Ooo-kay. I love you too, Onii-chan."

"Who says I said I love you?" Touya released her, grinning devilishly. "You ought to expect that from your little brat boyfriend. I think he luuuurves you."

"Oh you…" Sakura gritted her teeth. "I told you, Syaoran and I…"

"…are not an item blahdeyblahblah," Touya rolled his eyes. "But he better take care of you while we're gone. It's not like your ugly stupid snotty Chinese gay ex-boyfriend can."

Sakura smiled a bit at the insult to Yue. "Have a safe trip."

Touya couldn't resist a parting shot as he stepped out the door. "It will be cause you're not driving us to the airport."

"Mou! I never learned how!" Sakura yelled as the door closed. Fuming, she peered out the window and childishly stuck her tongue out at her brother, who retaliated in kind.

The house would be a lot quieter without them, Sakura knew, but she would miss them very much. She smiled as she turned back after locking up, then went upstairs to go to bed.

**~o0o~**

The screeching of brakes woke up the drunken boy who had playfully aimed for the other car in the opposing lane. He thought he'd been playing a video game but the terrified eyes of the driver, who had desperately tried to avoid him and whom he'd followed, gunning the engine, were now closed. Forever.

He got out of the car shakily. The tiny car had been pinned against a light post, and with his large SUV, a rarity in Japan, he had escaped injury when his airbag had deployed.

But the occupants of the other car…One of them had nearly been beheaded. Another had the steering column embedded in his chest along with fragments of the airbag. The third had been thrown clear—into the light post, shattering his body.

So much blood.

They were dead.

"Hey, do I get a one up?" he asked blearily.

No one answered. Passing cars were drawing to a halt and people were pointing, gasping, and turning horrified looks on him.

"Yeah! Points, points, points," he chanted as he walked unsteadily down the road.

"Didja see?" he said as he accosted a truck driver. "I killed them." He began to laugh; the liquor had clearly gone to his brain. "I rule at driving games!"

"This…is not…a game," the truck driver said in a strangled voice. "You ought to turn yourself over to the police."

"Fuck the police! Haha! I made a lot of dollars in this stage!"

The stunned truck driver gave chase as the drunken boy ran towards the remains of the Kinomotos and made to kick one of the bodies. Others pinned him down, and kept him there until the police arrived.

It was not until he was safely in prison that he realized what he had done and in what world of trouble he was in now. An attorney was telling him that he was not going to escape jail time, not with the many videos and photos of him prancing in a drunken, triumphant state at the wreck area.

Frantic calls to his fraternity mates yielded nothing. No one wanted to be associated with the "Drunken Frat Boy Killer," as the media had quickly dubbed him. Even the other inmates sneered at him, threatening revenge on "a boy of his social class."

The next morning, he was found hanging from his cell window. He had escaped justice, at least in this world.

**~o0o~**

Syaoran knew something was wrong when Sakura called him on that awful May morning. He'd greeted her with his usual flippant, "Good morning silly cherry pig!" and gotten a hesitant, "S-sy-Syaoran?" as a response.

Instantly alert, he asked, "Where are you?"

"Please…Syaoran…I can't do this alone…they…accident…otou-san…car…th-they were g-going t-to Narita airport…onii-chan…Yukito-san…" Her words were choked, like she was trying not to cry.

_Shit_, Syaoran thought, because his gut was telling him that the Kinomotos and Tsukishiro were the victims in the car accident he'd heard about over the radio that morning, and he'd been annoyed at the description of how the frat boy who had caused the accident had gloated at the scene—and Sakura had told him the night before that they were going on a road trip. "They…are they all right?"

"Uh…Maybe not. Dunno…The morgue…police called…" She was zoning out, and he knew he had to act fast. Sakura was a perky person, but she was not prepared to handle death, Syaoran knew. She had reserves of strength, certainly—but not for this.

"Stay there. Do not leave. Wait for me," Syaoran said, already halfway out the door. He later received an automatic ticket for speeding, and another for cutting several people off on the highway, but since he made it to Tomoeda from Tokyo in thirty minutes, he didn't care.

The drive to the morgue was quiet; Syaoran dared not say anything. He knew the awful truth, and he had no words, not even to comfort her. All he could do was let her cling to his hand as they entered the cold morgue. He swallowed his bile when he saw the ruin that had been Touya Kinomoto's chest, the nearly-decapitated Yukito Tsukishiro, the bloody mess that was Fujitaka Kinomoto. He had met them all and had even made a friend of Fujitaka; even now, in death Syaoran imagined Touya would glare at him and call him the 'rich Chinese brat Sakura hangs around with' as he always did.

But they would never open their eyes again.

Sakura, shaking hard, had tried to look at the bodies. At some point Eriol and Tomoyo arrived—probably Sakura had called Tomoyo, he thought. But they took over, sparing Sakura from more agony. Syaoran had not really seen what Tomoyo and Eriol had done that allowed them to identify the bodies when Sakura had failed to do so; she had brokenly told the coroner, "I don't know," when asked if they were her father, brother, and Yukito. Syaoran led her outside the morgue and leaned her against him.

"Cry," he said gently as he placed his arms around her. "You have to do it now so that you can deal with the funeral."

"Please take me home first," she asked quietly, and Syaoran had driven her home. Once home, she had insisted on straightening her father's office in the basement and his bedroom, then she had shown Syaoran Touya's room as well.

The bodies were quickly released from the morgue and the funeral and burial arrangements were made; Syaoran saw Eriol's hand in it. When Syaoran asked Eriol about it, Eriol calmly ignored the question and said instead, "I can't be at the memorial; I have someone…something to take care of. Please don't leave Sakura-san, and give her my…all my apologies for disappearing at the worst time. I promise, I have a good reason."

Syaoran had taken the call, too distracted to realize what Eriol had really told him, as he was following Sakura around the house. He vaguely said "Uh huh," and "Sure," to everything Eriol said. Sensing Syaoran's distraction, Eriol had hung up.

As Syaoran closed his cell phone, Sakura was saying, "…and when I broke that fishbowl, gosh, was he ever furious but he refused to say anything and he called me 'monster' instead so I wound up stomping his foot and I…"

He'd heard enough and knew what she needed. Syaoran placed a finger on her lips, stopping the confused babble. He'd leaned her against his chest wordlessly, and began stroking her back.

"My life…" Sakura began, "it feels like it ought to be over. I…I feel like I have nothing left to live for."

"It is not a waste or anything of the sort," Syaoran said gently. "Let it go, Sakura. You need to let go now. That way you can be stronger."

"I'm so weak," Sakura whispered. "I…"

"You're not weak," Syaoran said gently. "Life hasn't been kind to you, cherry. You've tried so hard, but…you're still here. So let go now. You need it."

"Someone told me tears are weakness," Sakura said quietly.

"Sometimes…" and Syaoran's breath hitched, because he could have been talking to himself, "sometimes it takes more strength to cry."

The tears came then, and she wept for a long time; at one point, Syaoran picked her up and brought her to her bedroom. The security of her room triggered more tears, but he sat in her bed, propped Sakura up against himself, and hugged her from behind, crooning and making soothing noises when her cries rose to a high pitch. After a long while, she calmed down.

"Please don't leave," she whispered.

He shook his head, and they sat there like children comforting each other until dawn, feeling the house and the presences in it begin to fade around them.

"Thank you," were her first words when the sun rose.

"Don't thank me yet," he said quietly. "Because I'm going to make sure you get through this shit and you might not appreciate my methods."

She turned, looking into his eyes, silently pleading for him to stay by her side. Tomoyo had vanished, and so had Eriol, but with Syaoran there, Sakura felt stronger. Safer.

And she thought she understood why Tomoyo was gone. She had been glowing lately with health and happiness, so in love with Touya that Sakura had rejoiced for her. Now Touya was gone…and Sakura, even in the throes of her pain, understood that nothing save for something truly terrible would have kept Tomoyo from her side.

What kept her sane was Syaoran. He had brought his clothes, toiletries, and his portable keyboard, moving into the room that used to be Touya's for the duration of the funeral. Syaoran took over the preparations which Eriol and Tomoyo had begun, coordinating with the funeral home for the treatment of the bodies, helping Sakura decide between burial and cremation, and quietly shouldering the expenses when the family's life plan did not cover the orphaned Yukito Tsukishiro's funeral.

Syaoran had practically lived in the Kinomoto house during the memorial, helping Sakura pass out incense and talk to visitors and serve tea and other refreshments. She had, to his surprise, held up magnificently, helping to clothe the bodies, gathering mementoes, donating clothes to charities, and winding up what she could of their personal affairs.

"Are you her husband?" an elderly neighbor asked as he served her tea. Syaoran smiled and was about to say no when she continued, "She's such a good girl, and you look like a very good boy. Take care of her."

"I will," Syaoran said, just as Sakura came up to give the old lady some rice cakes. He put an arm over her shoulder and squeezed; she smiled gratefully.

"I just want this to be over," Sakura whispered.

"You can stay with me, you know. I'm not sure you should be alone in this house," Syaoran said.

"I'll be fine. Besides, you've lost too many days of work already because of me."

"Screw work. This is important. You are not going to smile or laugh this away," Syaoran said sternly.

"Really Syaoran…"

He pressed her head against his chest. "Shut up," he whispered in her ear. "Okay? I'll just stay with you until this hell is over. If it bugs you," and he let her up; she wrinkled her nose and frowned at him, "you can make all my meals."

"That's just an excuse," she sniffed.

"Maybe it is." He smiled and squeezed her hand. "Now I think that's a high school friend of yours. Go talk to her."

"Okay." Sakura gave him a grateful smile then went off to welcome Rika Terada and her husband, who had been their grade school teacher.

"That's a very sweet boyfriend you have," Rika smiled. "I'm glad he's here for you at, well, a time like this. My blessings and condolences, Sakura."

"Thank you. Oh, no, he's not my boyfriend. He's my friend," Sakura said.

Rika and her husband exchanged glances, which said they would talk about this later. She hugged Sakura and gave a ritual offering of incense. "May the gods speed them on their way to the celestial home," Rika and Yoshiyuki said.

Sakura bowed, and escorted them to the reception area. On the way Syaoran met them with a tray on which cups of tea rested. He offered some to Rika and Yoshiyuki, then went to attend to a few other guests.

"Tomoyo-chan isn't here," Rika observed. "Curious."

Yoshiyuki squeezed her shoulder affectionately. "We'll find out more later, my sweetheart. Let's finish the rites for the dead first."

**~o0o~**

Sakura settled into a routine after the funeral in which she and Syaoran would spend time together daily. She kept her pain at bay by bringing her work home with her, but every now and then little reminders tore at her. Erasing the notes on the whiteboard which had kept track of their movements for the past twenty years made her cry; Syaoran found her, eraser in hand, unable to finish the task. He'd left the board as is, but made an addition that cheered Sakura up: "Syaoran: Home, will be back with Sakura in the morning."

Sometimes she would turn, thinking she heard Touya knocking or her father calling. As a child she had been afraid of ghosts, mortally so, but now she wished with all her heart that ghosts were real and she could see her father and Touya and Yukito just one more time.

Tomoyo came over a few days later, and Sakura was shocked at how much she had lost weight, how badly she looked, and how weak she was.

"Tomoyo-chan…" she started.

"Sakura-chan," Tomoyo said, holding up a hand and talking in an uncharacteristic whisper. "I'm so sorry…"

"What happened to you?" Sakura led her best friend into the house and made her lie down on the sofa.

"Please, Sakura-chan, forgive me," Tomoyo pleaded.

"I'm not angry," Sakura said, beginning to despair, "but tell me why you look like this!"

When no response came, Sakura decided it was time to tell Tomoyo she knew the truth. "Did you…hurt yourself when you found out Touya nii-chan was gone?"

"No! No, I would never…You knew?"

Sakura smiled. "I always knew."

"And you don't hate me?"

Brushing a strand of hair that had fallen into Tomoyo's lovely face, Sakura shook her head. "I love you and I understood why you needed to hide."

"I'm so sorry, I…" Tears began to come down Tomoyo's cheeks, and Sakura was shocked at how broken and in despair her best friend was. "Forgive me! I…Oh Sakura I came here to offer you comfort and I wasn't here when it happened but I lost our baby and I can't, I…"

"Baby?" Sakura raised Tomoyo's chin. "I am going to be an aunt?"

Tomoyo threw herself into Sakura's arms and wailed, "It was all I had left of him, God, Sakura, I loved him so much, so so much and I had to go and lose the baby and I couldn't be with you at the funeral and I never got to say goodbye and I never told Touya…" Her voice faded into incoherent whimpering and sobbing.

Sakura felt tears come down her face as well. How cruel fate was! If the baby had survived she and Tomoyo could have raised him or her together, remembering their beloveds that way. She hugged Tomoyo and stroked her hair.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know," she said between sobs.

"Please…please, it was my fault…" Tomoyo whispered.

"Shh. Don't blame yourself. I need you, and I'm here for you," Sakura said softly as she stroked Tomoyo's back soothingly.

The two friends cried together for a while, then Sakura insisted that Tomoyo stay with her if for the night. When Syaoran called and found out that Tomoyo was there, he gallantly told Sakura he would not come over.

"Because you two have a lot to talk about," he said.

And through the night, as the two women talked, they discovered how shared pain can bring comfort, and how love can heal hearts and bring them closer in friendship. Towards dawn Syaoran appeared with a basket of their favorite fruits and breakfast takeout plates, and he asked no questions, instead taking Sakura and Tomoyo out to lunch, then bringing them home afterwards.

"I don't know what I'd do without him," Sakura said as she waved goodbye.

"I'm sure it's more a case of you prefer not to have to do without him," Tomoyo smiled. Having regained her equinamity, she decided that focusing on the blossoming relationship between Sakura and Syaoran would be a good distraction for her.

"Eriol took very good care of you," Sakura ventured. She tiptoed around the subject, because Tomoyo always blithely ignored Eriol's obvious love for her.

"He did. He's a wonderful friend," she said gratefully.

_She's not ready, _Sakura realized. _Even though he's been in love with her for so long._

Perhaps the time had come to talk to Eriol about Tomoyo, she thought.

**~o0o~**

Sakura had been allowed a leave from her work for two weeks, and she was sorting through her family's papers when a rude knock sounded on her door.

"Yes?"

Big burly men were standing outside the house, their expressions menacing. Behind them was a tall young man with a cruel smirk on his face that kept it from being truly handsome.

"Kinomoto Sakura," he said softly. "My, what a surprise. Where's your silly best friend? Not present?"

Something was familiar about his face, but Sakura could not place it. He thrust some papers at her. "You have an hour to get your things and get out."

"What?" Sakura snatched at the papers and read through them. "My family just died! This is outrageous!" she cried. "What kind of agreement is this!"

"Missed a payment," the man sneered. "Or if you like we can go upstairs and you can make the payment now. You enjoyed your first time with me, after all."

"With you? Who…"

"Kito Kawada," he said smoothly. "Don't remember? You must be such a slut not to remember. You must've fucked so many guys between me and now." He laughed and eyed her slender body. "Although I must say, you never really filled out. That is still the same flat chest I remember."

Her face paled, then she screamed, "Get out! Get out of my house!" She lashed out at him with a palm, intending to slap him, but he dodged the blow easily.

"This is tiresome," he said. "Remove her," he barked at the men with him.

Sakura was picked up and bodily hauled out of the house, then thrown onto the pavement. The neighbors came to see what was happening.

"You there," the elderly neighbor said, hailing Kito. "Why are you doing this to Sakura?"

"Shut up, old hag, unless you want the same treatment," he smirked. The men began to padlock the house as one man held on to Sakura. She struggled furiously in his grip, kicking and screaming. The neighbors began to yell insults at Kito, and tried to come to Sakura's aid, but when one of the men drew a firearm, they backed off.

One of them had called the police, though, and when they arrived, Kito calmly told them he was conducting a foreclosure as a sheriff representing the bank Sakura's father had taken out a loan on.

"Begging your pardon sir," one of the policemen said respectfully, "but I think the lady should be allowed to get her things out of there first."

"Ah but as you can see, she is emotionally unstable. She might burn the house down, and where would that leave us?"

"We'll escort her in, sir," the cop said, standing his ground.

"What's the problem here?"

Everyone turned to see Syaoran, eyes blazing, walking quickly towards them. He moved to the man who was restraining Sakura, and said quietly, "If you value your life let her go."

"Ah the lover," Kito sneered. "Not bad, Sakura. And judging by his car, rich. You fuck him yet? How much is he paying you? Wait, he can't be paying you since you can't pay what your family owes us. You're fucking him for free, slut."

Syaoran cocked a fist, then at the last moment realized that was what the cruel-faced man wanted: to lure him into a fight in front of the authorities, resulting in time wasted at the station for bookings. Instead, he used his most arrogant tone to say, "No but I'm sure you want to fuck me very badly; after all, I'm more to your taste than she is."

It worked; Kito threw the punch first, and Syaoran rolled with it in the direction of one of the policemen, who then took the punch on the face.

Even Kito's goons knew they were in trouble; assaulting an officer of the law meant immediate jail time. Kito was cuffed and forced into the squad car. As he cursed Syaoran, Syaoran drew out his phone and began taking photos of Kito and his men, who fidgeted uneasily.

"How much does she owe?" he demanded of one of the men.

"S'in those papers," one of them grunted.

He scanned them quickly. "One missed payment and the penalty is thirty percent? That's loansharking! I'll have your licenses for this," he said furiously.

"But we…"

"I know the law," Syaoran seethed, "and a debtor is allowed a grace period for a first time missed payment after due warning. So unless you want real trouble, leave her alone," he said. "My lawyer will deal with all of you. Now remove those padlocks and get out of here."

Sakura's neighbors were nodding and pressing around the four men, muttering threats. Without a leader, they were at a loss for something to do, and so when one of them said, "Let's do it then beat it," they followed.

Sakura was leaning against the wall next to the gate, looking blank-eyed and more defeated than Syaoran had ever seen her. He went over and grabbed her shoulders.

"Sakura?"

No response.

He shook her. "Sakura!"

A gentle hand was placed on his arm. "She's in shock, dear boy," the elderly neighbor who had been at the funeral said. "Pick her up and bring her in. Something about that man who got arrested threw her badly."

"What happened?" Syaoran asked as he turned to take Sakura into his arms.

The old lady furrowed her brow. "He said something about being her first then insulted her several times. She tried to slap him and screamed at him to get out."

He didn't like the sound of it. "Shit. Sorry, obaa-san," he apologized quickly.

"Go take care of her," she said.

Syaoran gently took her into his arms and carried her into the house, starting when she said softly, "He's right. I'm a whore."

"What?" He stared down at her, realizing that there was much more to the story than he knew at the moment.

**To be continued in chapter 6**

My thanks for the reviews go out to (and sorry I was unable to respond this time--I just sneaked out to post this; I'll respond when I can, hope you don't mind!): Jusenkyo, sootyxsnowpetal, pyscho-pyro-shrink, Seirin, More Than Useless, DN Angel and Cardcaptor Sakura, chibiNeko192, winterkaguya, smile4meeh, xSapphirexRosesxFanx, puasloma, Yingfa Dreamer, Wings of Wind, cupid17, XxButterflyxAngelxLover, AngelEmCuti, Julia and Tania, mystic emeralds, YamiNoTomoyo, vreni, butterflyKISSU, camillecamille04.


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